...all MSR all the time...
		Where There's a Will I'd never had a week in the office by myself when I hadn't been a nervous wreck. Usually when I was here alone it was because Mulder had ditched me or something even worse. I had actually managed to accomplish quite a lot. All of the files were back in order and I had finished off all of the paperwork on some cases that we had let slide. With all of that done, this morning I was cleaning. Mulder wouldn't let the cleaning staff in here and eventually I would have to clean or go crazy. At least when he wasn't here I could clean in peace. Normally every time I tried to clean anything he'd be yelping "Don't touch that!" or "Be careful!". This time I'd cleaned things that he'd never let me touch before. I hadn't heard from Mulder since Monday night. He'd had a rough week. A good friend of his had been killed in a car accident. His friend's wife had been critically injured in the wreck and had died two days later. I went to both funerals with him, but he had taken a couple of personal days to deal with the shock. He'd called me the night before last to drop another bombshell. He'd been called to the reading of the wills and he had no idea why. It was taking place this morning and I was expecting to hear from him anytime now. I'd just finished putting my cleaning supplies away when the phone rang. "Hi, Scully, it's me," he said when I answered the phone. "How'd it go, Mulder?" "I need your help, Scully." His voice was quiet. "What is it? What's happened?" "I have to talk to you in person." The sound of Mulder's voice had me worried. Something had him very concerned and I wished he would tell me now, but I wasn't going to upset him further. "Okay, Mulder," I consented. "Whatever you need." After he'd given me the address, I called Kimberly to let her know that I was leaving. In half an hour I was pulling into the driveway of a family home in the outskirts of Arlington. A mini-van with two car seats inside was also parked there. Chris and Lisa Prescott must have had a second car. Mulder met me at the front door looking like he'd seen a ghost. "What's going on, Mulder?" "Come and sit down." Taking me by the hand, he led me into the living room. "Do you remember a few years ago, I was proud of myself because Chris had asked me to be godfather to his son, Jordan?" Mulder reminded me as we sat down on the couch. "That's just an honorary title, Mulder. It doesn't mean anything unless it was written into the..." I let my voice trail off. His eyes widened and he nodded his head slowly. "Surely there's someone else who will take him, Mulder; some family," I tried to reassure him. "Them, Scully. They had a baby girl, Megan, six months ago. The way the wills were written, I am sole legal guardian to both." "Still, Mulder, isn't there any family?" "Yes, Lisa's parents, but..." "What? Don't they want the children?" "No, it's not that, Scully. They--" He stopped short when we heard the front door open. A couple who looked to be in their mid-to-late fifties appeared in the archway that led to the living room. Mulder stood up and I followed him. "Mr. and Mrs. Barnes, this is Dana Scully. Dana, these are Lisa's parents," Mulder introduced us. Both Mr. and Mrs. Barnes were dressed in ill-fitting, outdated clothing, but surely Mulder wouldn't hold their standard of living against them. I walked over to them. "Nice to meet you Mr. Barnes, Mrs. Barnes." I shook their hands in turn. "Hello, Miss Scully," Mr. Barnes nodded. The smell of alcohol on his breath nearly knocked me over. It was barely three in the afternoon. He didn't seem drunk, but I knew that didn't mean anything. Now that I was closer I could see that Mrs. Barnes had tiny broken veins all over her nose and cheeks. Now I knew why Mulder wasn't thrilled about giving up custody to Lisa's parents. I didn't blame him. But what could he do? He was certainly in no position to raise two children under five. Sitting down in an armchair, Mrs. Barnes lit a cigarette and then scanned the room with an air of ownership. Had Chris and Lisa left her parents the home, but left the children to Mulder? "Mr. Mulder," Mr. Barnes cleared his throat. "Liz and me have already spoke to a lawyer. He said that a single man in your line of work don't have a hope in hell of getting those kids because we're gonna fight you for them." Mulder had sat back down on the couch. He couldn't meet Mr Barnes' eyes, preferring to stare intently at his hands. "The temporary custody hearing is tomorrow. We'll see you in court," Mr. Barnes continued. "C'mon Liz, let's go." When they were gone I sat down beside Mulder again and picked up his hand. "Chris told me a few things about what it was like for Lisa growing up," Mulder shook his head. "She struggled to work her way through school. She wanted a better life for her kids." "What are you going to do, Mulder?" "I talked to my lawyer. Mr. Barnes is right. I don't stand a chance," he sighed dejectedly. "But it's so obvious that they drink. Doesn't that count for anything?" "I asked the same question. They've got blood and stability on their side," he rolled his eyes. "Stability?" I grimaced. Mulder just shrugged. "Why did you ask me here? Do you want me to help you come up with a plan?" I inquired. "No, Scully. I already have a plan." He lifted his eyes to meet mine. "My lawyer said that I would have a much better chance if I was married." "So you're planning to meet someone, fall in love and ask her to marry you before tomorrow?" I couldn't help chuckling. "Sort of," he grinned. "Good luck! Where do you think that you are going find someone who will not only agree to marry you, but take on an instant family as well?" He looked at me with a big silly grin on his face. It took a minute for it to sink in. You're not serious, Mulder?" I exclaimed. "Are you really asking me to marry you?" "Are you turning me down?" His face fell. "Mulder! How can we--? What do you--?" I sputtered. "Do you want those kids to end up with the Barnes'?" "Well, no," I admitted. "Can you think of a better solution?" "There isn't any other family?" I was grasping at straws. "Nope." "So you want me to live a lie?" I asked in disbelief. "I don't know what else to do, Scully. If I thought those kids had half a chance with the Barnes..." What could I say? I didn't want two innocent kids left with those people either. But marrying Mulder? "Mulder, if I agree to this, it'll be on my terms." "What terms?" "I don't mind helping you raise these kids, but you'll have to pull your weight," I began. "I promise I won't be an absentee dad." He crossed his heart as he spoke. "And you'll have to help with the housework," I continued with my demands. "I will," he promised. "And we won't be able to go out of town on cases all of the time." "Other agents with families still manage to do their jobs, Scully," he pointed out. "That may be true, but I still think we'll have to do more investigating before we hop on a plane. And we'll have to start trusting some of the agents in the field offices to do some of the investigating too," I suggested. "That sounds reasonable," he consented. I couldn't believe that I was sitting there negotiating terms of marriage with Mulder. Was I nuts? "Mulder, what happens if you fall in love with someone? Then what?" "Scully, I'm willing to make this sacrifice. I know that it might not be easy, but I think that you and I can make it work," he told me earnestly. "I'm willing to make a commitment to you *and* to these kids." "And you're willing to give up any chance of a life with someone that you're in love with?" I was still having difficulty believing this. "What happens if I give up and let the Barnes have custody and then I never end up with the person that I love? We all make choices in life, Scully and I'll completely understand if you choose not do this." God, I loved this man and he had absolutely no idea. Yes, he'd said that he loved me before, but it wasn't the same way that I loved him. And here he was asking me to marry him; saying that he was willing to commit to me. This wasn't how I'd fantasized that Mulder and I would end up together, but the fact that he was willing to make this sacrifice for those kids just made me love him more. "Where *are* the kids?" I asked suddenly. "At the neighbors'," he informed me. "They were babysitting at the time of the accident." "Where would we live?" "Here. As legal guardian, they left me the house, their savings and their insurance policies. And the house is paid off; they had mortgage insurance." "I don't think money would have been an issue, Mulder." With our salaries we could easily afford to raise the kids. "Unfortunately, Scully, I think that's all that the Barnes are interested in," he sighed. "I got the same impression," I admitted. We fell silent for a few minutes. I couldn't believe that I was even considering this. Mulder's eyes never left me. "I know that I'm asking a lot, Scully and I'm not asking lightly. The Prescott's lawyer gave me a heads up yesterday about what was in the will. He also told me to expect a fight from the Barnes'. When Lisa was in the hospital they tried to get the kids, but the neighbors wouldn't give them up. The lawyer had to tell them that they hadn't been named legal guardians," he filled me in on some of the history. "I've been thinking about this since yesterday. In fact, I was up most of the night thinking about it. People used to have arranged marriages all the time. You never know what might happen. And no matter what *does* happen, Scully, I promise that I will take my marriage vows seriously." So Mulder thought that he might grow to love me. Maybe he would, after all, anything's possible. "I'm glad to hear you say that, Mulder, because making a promise like this is not something that I would take lightly either," I told him. "I knew that you would take it seriously, Scully. I wouldn't have asked you if I thought you'd take it lightly." "Are you sure about this, Mulder? You'd be giving up a lot." "No more than I'm asking you to give up," he pointed out. "And look at what I'd be gaining--a beautiful wife and a couple of great kids." Color flooded my cheeks almost instantly. "Besides, Scully," he continued, "Who else could put up with me? I don't think I'm giving up much of anything." What about sex? But I guess that was hardly an issue for either of us. We'd both gone the better part of seven years mostly celibate. That thought made me think of something else. "Mulder, I will not have pornography in a house with children." "I'll get rid of it all, Scully. I already thought of that." "And the triple X channel?" I added. "Yes, dear," he grinned at me. "Does that mean yes?" "I guess so," I groaned. He chuckled, " I always thought that when I finally did ask someone to marry me, it would be met with a little more enthusiasm." "And I always thought that I'd be marrying someone who loved me," I laughed. "I do love you, Scully, you know that." "Let's just hope that you're still saying that six months from now," I laughed again. "Oh, one more thing, Mulder." "Yeah?" "How many bedrooms are there? Where will I sleep?" "There are four bedrooms, Scully, but we'll have to share a bed." "Why do we have to share a bed?" My voice rose an octave. "When I talked to my lawyer, I mentioned asking you and he said that if either the Barnes or the social worker assigned to the case ever suspected that this was a marriage of convenience they would take the kids away from us," he explained. All I could do was stare at him in utter shock. I think my mouth was hanging open. "I'm sorry, Scully. It was a dumb idea, but thank you for even considering it." "I didn't say no, Mulder. I just had no idea that..." I couldn't finish my sentence. "So, you'll do it?" His face brightened. "What am I going to tell my mother?" I put my face in my hands. "I think we'll have to tell everyone the same thing--that we've been involved for a while and that we've been talking about getting married, but we weren't really in a hurry until now." "Is that what you're going to tell Skinner?" Lifting my face out of my hands, I looked at him in disbelief. "Yup." "I can't believe that I'm agreeing to this." I shook my head. "You won't be sorry, Scully. I promise." We spent the entire following day in court. All morning was spent being interviewed separately by court-appointed social workers. After lunch there was a short hearing where both parties presented their cases. Then we waited for two hours while the judge deliberated. I held my breath while she was reading her decision. I couldn't believe my ears. Mulder and I were awarded temporary custody. The Barnes could visit the children at the Prescott family home, but were not allowed to leave with them. Both of them had drunk driving convictions, and Mulder's lawyer made sure that the judge was aware of that. In three months there would be another hearing to make the final decision. In the interim, Mulder and I were to get married and we were also to expect impromptu visits from the social worker; just to see how things were going. The Barnes would also be receiving visits from the social worker. The hearing in three months wouldn't involve us. It would strictly be up to the social worker. Mulder hugged and kissed me in the courtroom. I was going to have to get used to his public displays of affection. He didn't want there to be any risk that people might think that we weren't truly in love. I was just worried that I might start believing that Mulder really did love me. In preparation for this eventuality, Mulder had rented a moving van. I'd told him that sleeping in the same bed with him was one thing, but sleeping in another couples marriage bed was an entirely different matter. He agreed and we spent the evening moving my bedroom furniture, my computer, his computer, his dresser and his fish. Kids love fish, he assured me. After some discussion, we decided that Mulder would keep his service weapon in my lock box until he got one of his own. Then we would keep them separately and we would each keep keys for both boxes. The Gunmen, who had been on standby, pitched in to help us. We brought most of our clothes, almost all of my food, and we threw out what Mulder was culturing in his fridge. Frohike drove the van, while Mulder and I each drove our own cars to our new home. The court order said that the Wesleys would turn the children over to us at 9 a.m. the next morning. That didn't give me much time to get everything in order. While the guys helped Mulder move the Prescott's bedroom furniture to the basement and mine to the master bedroom, I went to work in the kitchen. Most of the food in the fridge had spoiled, so I spent a long time tossing things out and cleaning. Someone'd had the presence of mind to take out the garbage and there weren't any dirty dishes. When I was finished with the fridge, I washed the kitchen floor and then vacuumed the rugs downstairs. I was just about to start on the stairs when the Gunmen came stampeding down. After we thanked the guys profusely, they left with the van, promising to return it in the morning. "It's after 11, Scully. We should probably think about getting some sleep. Tomorrow is a big day," Mulder suggested when we were alone again. "I still need to vacuum the stairs and the bedrooms and then change Jordan and Megan's beds," I told him. "Do you have to do all of that tonight?" he asked. I nodded, "I don't want to have to worry about cleaning the first day they're here, Mulder. I'm sure we'll have enough to do." "Then I'll do the vacuuming, okay?" he offered. "Thanks, Mulder," I smiled. Megan's room was right beside the master bedroom. It was white with pink accents; the crib and the window were decked out with white eyelet and bunnies adorned everything from the quilt over the back of the rocker to the tiny lamp on the dresser. After finding some sheets in a drawer under the change table, I quickly changed the crib mattress. As much as Megan's room was a perfect little girl's room, Jordan's was a little boy's; right down to the race car bed with the Knicks comforter. Mulder would definitely approve. I had to find the linen closet to find sheets for Jordan's bed, but then I made quick work of his bed too. Mulder was just finishing in the baby's room when I came into the hallway, my arms full of sheets. I motioned for him to turn off the vacuum. "I'm going to have a shower as soon as I put this stuff in the laundry room," I told him. "I'll be in there as soon as you're done," he said wiping his sweaty brow. I tried not to be too long in the shower, but Mulder was waiting his turn when I emerged from the master bath in my pajamas. "Did you notice Jordan's comforter," I asked him with a smile. "I gave that to him for his third birthday, Scully," he informed me with a grin. "I should have figured," I laughed. Since I didn't have an ounce of energy left, I was delighted to see that Mulder had made our bed. Our bed! The thought brought butterflies to life in my stomach. I was terrified that I would wake up and find myself wrapped around him. Or worse, find out from him that I'd said something in my sleep. Not that he would be offended, but I don't think that I could face him if he knew how I felt about him. Especially since it was so painfully obvious to me that his love for me was as a dear friend. If he found out how I really felt, it would put a definite strain on things. My fears had obviously not been enough to overcome my total body fatigue, because the next thing I knew, lively morning banter wishing me a happy Friday jolted me out of a sound sleep. When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was Mulder's chest, inches away from my face. It was certainly a pleasant sight to wake up to and I was incredibly relieved that I wasn't draped over him. So far, so good! Rolling to my back, I yawned and stretched. "Your feet don't even reach the foot of the bed when you do that," a sleep roughened voice teased me. "Shut up," Mulder." I reached over and smacked his chest with the back of my hand. "Hey!" he protested, grabbing my wrist. "That's spousal abuse." "Not," I laughed, freeing my wrist. "You're not my spouse yet and besides, when they hear about all of the mental cruelty that I endure, the case will be dismissed." "I was just kidding," he pouted. "Don't dish it out if you can't take it, Mulder," I poked him in the chest again. "Yes, dear," he sighed. "That's more like it," I laughed. Since the master bath had a long vanity with two sinks, Mulder and I were able to get ready at the same time. By 7:30 we were downstairs deciding what to have for breakfast. "The water that I put in the aquarium should be ready now. Do you mind if I go transfer the fish?" he asked as I was making the coffee. "That's fine, but what do you want for breakfast?" "I don't know. Cereal? Toast? Whatever," he said as he left the kitchen. Breakfast was on the table when he got back. His eyes grew wide when he saw it. "I didn't expect you to get it for me, Scully, and I didn't expect cereal and toast." "And I'm all worn out, Mulder." I put a hand to my forehead. "And you might try saying thank you." "Sorry," he grimaced, "Thanks, Scully." Over breakfast we planned our day. We needed to get some groceries and we also had to pick up our marriage license. We thought that the morning should be spent with the kids, letting them adjust to us a bit and then we could run our errands in the afternoon. "Gotta love Virginia," Mulder chuckled, " 30 bucks, no blood tests and no waiting." "You already know how much it costs?" I raised an eyebrow. "I called to check it out," he shrugged. "Did you assume that I'd agree to this?" "Actually, Scully, you were a lot easier to convince than I thought you would be. I was prepared to get down on my hands and knees and kiss your feet." "Damn! I knew I should have held out longer," I laughed. Before I'd even finished my sentence, Mulder was on his knees pulling off my beige cotton sock. "Mulder!" I protested. "Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful feet, Scully?" he asked, not letting go of my foot. "Mulder!" I hoped that my protests sounded genuine, because they weren't. I loved the way his large hands held my foot so gently. I watched in awe as he bent to press his lips to my instep. "Your toes are so tiny," he said before kissing each one in turn. "Mulder!" This time my voice was barely a whisper. "Excuse me." An amused voice made us both look up in surprise. "Can I help you?" Mulder asked as he gently set my foot down and stood up. "I'm sorry. I'm Sheila Wesley," the fortyish woman introduced herself. "And you must be Dana Scully and Fox Mulder. I'm sorry I startled you. I'm just so used to letting myself in," she showed us her key. "It's hard to break old habits." "Don't worry about it," Mulder extended his hand. "Mulder, that hand was just on my foot." "Scully, after your shower last night, that foot spent the night in bed and then you put a sock on it. Besides, I was just kissing it, I can personally vouch for it's cleanliness," he said as he shook Sheila's hand. "You call each other by your last names?" she asked in surprise. "We're partners with the F.B.I. and we've called each other by our last names for seven years now. It's like you said, Sheila, old habits are hard to break," Mulder smiled. "Would you like a cup of coffee, Sheila?" I asked after I'd slipped my sock back on. "That would be nice, thank you," she smiled. "I just popped over because I thought I'd bring Jordan and Megan's things back over. Just so there isn't too much going on when I drop them off." "Probably a wise idea," I agreed as I handed Sheila her cup. "I thought I could fill you in on a few things about them, too." "Anything that you could tell us would be a great help," I assured her. "This has all come as such a surprise." So Sheila told us everything that she knew about the kids. Jordan had been toilet trained for a while now, but he'd been having accidents recently, which was perfectly understandable. He was a good eater, but he didn't like broccoli. Megan had just started on cereal and fruit. Lisa had been breast-feeding her, but she seemed to be adjusting to the formula with no difficulty. As Sheila spoke, I was thankful that I had paid attention all those years that my mother had babysat to bring in extra money. Looking after my nephews would end up being of some help with Jordan, too. "Megan wakes for a bottle at about two in the morning, and she'll sleep for a couple of hours both morning and afternoon," Sheila continued. "What time do you put her down for the night?" I wanted to know. "At about 8, Jordan at about 8:30; he likes a couple of stories first." "This is a lot to remember," Mulder said, shaking his head. "Well, I'm right next door if you have any questions. Do you have a pen? I'll leave you my number." As I was retrieving pen and paper, Sheila remembered something else. "Oh and Jordan doesn't sleep in the morning anymore, but he will go down for a couple of hours in the afternoon." I glanced at Mulder, so much for running our errands in the afternoon. Sheila caught us exchanging glances. "What?" she looked puzzled. "Nothing, we were just planning to run some errands this afternoon," I explained. "Oh," Sheila smiled. "I usually try to do that kind of thing in the morning. Megan will still sleep in her car seat and Jordan's nap isn't disturbed. "That's fine," Mulder smiled. "Nothing was cast in stone." After we'd finished our coffee Sheila and I carried the kids' things upstairs. We set up the baby monitor and then she helped me put away the clothes and toys. When we got back downstairs Mulder was just finishing cleaning up after breakfast. "Can you teach my husband to do that?" Sheila laughed. "Years of hard work," I smiled and Mulder nodded somberly in agreement. "I've just been banging my head against a brick wall," Sheila admitted with a chuckle. "Anyhoo, I'll just get the kids cleaned up. My 13 year old was giving them breakfast. God only knows what they look like now." "Thanks for all of your help," I smiled as I saw her out. "Wow, Scully," Mulder said after I'd shut the door. "Are you going to be able to remember half of that?" "Yes, Mulder. We'll be fine," I assured him. "What happened to your photographic memory?" "I guess I'm losing it in my old age," he smirked. "Since we have a couple of minutes, Mulder, I'm going to call my mom. Why don't you call Skinner and let him know what's happening." "Trade ya?" He looked at me hopefully. "Sorry," I shook my head. I called my mother and invited her to lunch. She was very confused when I gave her the directions. I promised to explain when she got here. When I went back into the living room, Mulder was just putting down his cell phone. "What did Skinner say?" I asked with a smile. "Not much, actually," Mulder grinned. "I guess we've finally rendered him speechless." "He didn't say anything?" I couldn't believe it. "He did say that the Bureau has some provisions for people in our position and we could take as much time as we needed." "He said that?" "That and congratulations," Mulder shrugged. I was still laughing when we heard the front door open. "Here we are," Sheila sang. Sheila handed Megan to me and Mulder swung Jordan up into his arms. "Hey, buddy," I haven't seen you in a while," Mulder smiled at him. "Hi, Mulder," Jordan said quietly. "This is Dana, Jordan," Mulder introduced me. "Hi, Jordan," I smiled at him. "Hi," he whispered. "Remember, I'm right next door if you need anything," Sheila reminded us with a smile and pulled the door closed behind her as she left. That was it. Mulder and I were parents. Jordan Prescott was a serious looking boy with dark hair and eyes. Megan didn't have much hair to speak of, but what she did have was fair. Her eyes were dark blue and she smiled with her whole face. If I hadn't known better, I wouldn't think that they were brother and sister. Neither Mulder nor I had said a single word since Sheila closed the door. The tension in the air was palpable. "Maybe we should head out right away," I broke the uneasy silence. "Do you want to come shopping, Jordan?" "Is Mulder coming too?" he asked quietly. It was a relief that Jordan knew Mulder fairly well. I can't imagine what this would have been like if Mulder hadn't seen him for a while. "You bet," Mulder smiled. "Maybe Dana will let us get some cookies." Jordan gave Mulder a small smile. I couldn't imagine how Jordan was feeling. I'm not sure what he had been told about what happened to his parents. All he knew was that first he had stayed with his neighbors, and now he was back in his own home, but his parents weren't here. He must have been feeling abandoned. I hoped that Mulder and I would be able to help him deal with those feelings. "You'll have to make sure that Mulder behaves himself, okay, Jordan?" I smiled. "Okay," he smiled at me for the first time. "I'll go and move the carseats to my car," Mulder said, heading towards the front door. "Why don't we just take the van?" I asked, somewhat puzzled by his suggestion. "The van?" Mulder grimaced. "Gotta walk the walk now, Mulder," I grinned. After packing the kids into the car, we went straight to the grocery store. I directed Mulder to a market that had shopping carts with baby seats attached and as I'd hoped, shortly after we got to the store, Megan dozed off and slept until we took her out of the seat to put her back into the van. With the cargo space full of groceries, we set off to do our other errand. The clerk at the court house looked very amused when Mulder and I requested a marriage license standing there holding two children. After we paid the thirty dollar fee the clerk gave us a list of justices of the peace. Then she informed us with a smile that there was usually a two week wait for an available justice and our license would expire in 90 days. We left the office with me carrying Megan while Mulder took Jordan. Mulder's free hand grasped mine and he gave it a small squeeze. "I didn't think that we'd have to wait that long," he said quietly. "It's only a couple of weeks, Mulder. We have three months." "I'm afraid that if you have too much time to think about it, you'll change your mind," he told me sheepishly. "I won't change my mind, Mulder. In my heart I have already made this commitment. Nothing will change that," I assured him. "And you wonder why I love you." He gave my hand another gentle squeeze. Maybe Mulder was right. Maybe he would grow to love me the way that I loved him. But his love and respect for me were enough to satisfy me for now. By 11 o'clock we were all home safe and sound; kids, groceries and marriage license included. My biggest concern now was how I was going to explain all of this to my mother. Since Megan was wide awake, I sat her in her high chair and gave her a few toys to play with. Jordan was helping Mulder bring in the groceries. While I was putting everything away I chatted with Megan, telling her what I was doing. I wanted her to become familiar with my voice. Mulder took Jordan into the living room to show him the fish. I had unpacked about half of the bags when Jordan came running into the kitchen. "Dana, Dana, Mulder says that maybe we can get a puppy." He was grinning from ear to ear. "Well, not right away, Jordan." I tried to be diplomatic. What was Mulder thinking, telling him that we could get a dog? "Mulder said maybe later?" he asked hopefully. "C'mere, Jordan," I sat down at the table and patted my knee. He walked over slowly and I pulled him onto my lap. He looked up at me expectantly with his big dark eyes. "I think it would be fun to get a puppy," I smiled at him. "I really like dogs, but puppies need a lot of attention. I think that everything is so new to all of us that we should spend some time getting to know each other before we get a puppy, okay?" "So we can't get a puppy?" His bottom lip began to quiver. "Not right away, Jordan, but we will," I tried to ease his fears. "Maybe you and Mulder could look at pictures of dogs. You could pick out which ones you like." "Okay," Jordan smiled and slid down off of my lap. I glanced up to see Mulder standing in the doorway looking terrified. "Dana says that we should look at some pictures first," Jordan announced, running over to Mulder. "Dana has lots of good ideas," Mulder smiled. "Why don't you see if you can find that cool blue fish again. I'll be right there." Mulder watched as Jordan trotted towards the living room. Then he pulled a chair over and sat down beside me. Megan was busily chewing on her teething ring. She stopped when Mulder sat down and graced him with a big smile. Apparently Mulder had a way with all of the ladies of the house. Returning her grin, he gave her cheek a little caress. "Whatcha got, Meggie?" he asked her. Grinning at him again, she picked up a different toy to see how it tasted. Mulder leaned closer to me and picked up my hand. "I'm sorry about that, Scully. I tried to tell him that we could get a puppy when things settle down, meaning after the final custody hearing, but I couldn't explain that to him. He's bright enough, but I don't want to get into that with him right now." "Don't worry about it, Mulder. It's under control. As long as we talk about it, and look at pictures, I'm sure he'll be happy." "Then I'd better go and set up my computer so that Jordan and I can find some pictures to look at," he grinned. He got up and walked to the door. "Thanks, Scully," he said, still looking a little embarrassed, before he left the kitchen. Since Mulder had Jordan occupied and Megan seemed content to chew on her toys, I finished putting away the groceries and then moved on to making lunch. I had just finished making the salad when my mom walked into the kitchen. She looked at me and then at Megan, her brow furrowed. "What's going on, Dana?" "It's a very long story, Mom and I don't want to say anything in front of the kids. I'll tell you after lunch, okay? Could you feed Megan while I finish here, please?" "Sure," she agreed, sounding somewhat helpless. I quickly mixed up some cereal, mashed half of a banana and then gave the dish to my mother. When we were shopping, Jordan had picked out some chicken and stars soup, so I put that on the stove to heat. I made some sandwiches and then called Jordan and Mulder. During the meal we chatted about inconsequential things. My mom told Jordan to call her Maggie, and he seemed to really like her. By the time we were finished eating, Megan was almost asleep in her chair. My mom came upstairs with me to put Megan in her crib. When we passed the master bedroom her jaw literally dropped when she saw my furniture. Changing Megan quickly, I laid her on her side in the crib. Her eyelids fluttered closed as I pulled the blanket up. I found myself smiling at the sweet picture that she presented. Glancing at my mother, I discovered that she was smiling, too. "She's a good baby," my mother whispered as we left the room. "Not like you; you were stubborn. You never wanted to sleep." "You've never told me that before," I laughed. "It never came up," she shrugged with a smile. As we passed the master bedroom again, my mother stopped and had a closer look. "I hope you are going to tell me soon why your bedroom furniture is here, whose house this is and whose kids you're looking after." "Let me get Jordan down for his nap, then we can talk. Okay, Mom?" When we got back to the kitchen Mulder was just starting the dishwasher with Jordan's help. "I'll take him upstairs," Mulder offered when he saw us. "Okay, let's go sit in the living room so we can talk." While Mulder was gone, I told my mother the whole story. When he joined us in the living room, she was still in shock. "You're getting married?" she asked Mulder in disbelief. He nodded, smiling. "And you will probably end up with full custody of the children?" "I hope so," he said, nodding again. "And you've been involved for a while and you didn't tell me?" "We thought it would be best to keep it discreet. Tongues wag enough at work about us already," Mulder told her. "Well, you could have told me," she said sounding hurt. "I'm sorry, Mom," I apologized. "I can tell you one thing. I will not have you married by a justice of the peace. I'll call Father McCue," she said briskly, scanning the room for a phone. "Mom, a justice of the peace will be fine," I tried to put her off. "No," she said firmly. "But Mulder's not Catholic and we haven't had any marriage classes," I tried to argue. "Father McCue will understand the special circumstances and he will do it as a favor to me," she informed me crisply. Mulder sat there grinning. Apparently he knew better than to argue with my mother. She spent about five minutes on the phone and she was smiling when she hung up. "It's all set. Tomorrow at 11." "Mom!" I protested. "We don't have rings--I don't have a dress." "You can wear my dress. I always wanted you to anyway. And Fox can go out right now and buy the rings. It isn't really what I'd hoped for your wedding, Dana, but it will have to do." Before I had a chance to debate it further with my mother, Mulder was gone with instructions to buy simple bands and my ring size written on a piece of paper just to be sure. "Now, who are you going to invite?" my mother smiled, getting right down to business. "Invite?" I repeated. "Well you'll need a maid of honor and Fox will need a best man. You have to have witnesses," she pointed out. "I'd like you to stand up with me, Mom." I told her "It would mean a lot to me." "Thank you, dear. I would love to." Her smile lit up her face. Who would stand up with Mulder was another matter altogether. I couldn't envision any of the Gunmen agreeing to sign an official document, so as far as I knew that only left Skinner. I probably should have let Mulder make the call but I thought that time was of the essence. Skinner was completely taken aback by my request, but agreed as soon as he found his voice again, promising to be here at 10 the following morning. Next I called the Gunmen to invite them as well. I knew they wouldn't have anything more pressing to do and I also knew that they would want to witness Mulder taking his last breath as a free man. Although I'm sure that Frohike wasn't too pleased that I was going to be Mulder's ball and chain. I wasn't sure if they knew how to behave at a wedding, but at least I knew that Byers would look presentable. "Is there anyone else you'd like to invite?" my mother asked when I'd hung up with Langly. "I can't think of anyone else who could make it on such short notice." All of my friends and family had lives. As for my mother; she was in her element. Nothing would keep her away. "What about the kids?" she inquired. "What about them?" I wrinkled my brow. "Do you know of anyone who could watch them?" "I'd like them to be here," I told her. "That's fine dear, but you won't be able to look after them and neither will Fox," she reminded me gently. The Gunmen flickered briefly through my mind, but I dismissed that thought quickly. Then I remembered Sheila Wesley. I hoped that she wouldn't think that I was asking too much. Like Skinner, she was very surprised by my request, but accepted almost immediately. "I don't think that my husband, Wayne, will want to come. But I'd like to bring my daughter Sarah. She loves the kids and she'll be able to help as well." "Thank you, Sheila, that would be great. You have no idea how much I appreciate this," I gushed. "You are more than welcome," Sheila assured me. "Okay," my mother rubbed her hands together when I was done on the phone. "I should get going. I have a lot to do before tomorrow." "Is there anything that I should do?" I asked in confusion. My head was still spinning from my mother's whirlwind wedding planning. "I think that your hands will be full with the children," she smiled. "I'll be here bright and early tomorrow morning. We'll start with your hair." With that she was gone, and suddenly the house seemed very big and very empty. I went upstairs to check on the kids and brought the baby monitor back downstairs with me. I had seen a chicken in the freezer when I was cleaning, so I pulled it out and put it in the microwave to defrost. The fact that I was working in Lisa Prescott's kitchen, cooking food that she had bought depressed me. If I hadn't thought that the kids needed to stay here, just for some constancy, I'd have asked Mulder to look into getting a new place. I tried to shake off my queasiness about using Lisa's things and get to work. I wasn't helping anyone by being squeamish. So I prepared the vegetables briskly, trying to keep my mind on the job at hand. I was sure that soon enough I would be accustomed to my new setting and the grief brought on by the reason that I was here would eventually fade into sad memory. After I'd stuffed the bird and put it into the oven, I cleaned everything up thoroughly because I was going to make some baby food for Megan. Mulder thought that I was nuts, but I'd helped make it for my nephews. It was quite easy, except for the meat. That I would buy when Megan was ready for it. When Mulder got back, I was spooning applesauce into an icecube tray. The aroma of roasting chicken was beginning to fill the kitchen. "It smells good in here," he smiled at me. "Thanks. Did you have any luck?" I looked up at him. "Yup," he smiled reaching into his pocket. "But they aren't really plain." "No?" "I liked them when I saw them, but if you don't I can take them back." Inside the small velvet box sat two bands of gold. Picking up the smaller one, I turned it in my fingers looking at the etching that encircled it. The design was simple; two delicate vines that intertwined in a unbroken loop. "It's beautiful, Mulder," I sighed. "I hoped that you might like it," he smiled, seemingly pleased that I was happy with his choice. "I do, Mulder. I really do," I assured him. As I was reaching out to replace the ring, something caught my eye. Pulling it back, I looked at it closely. Something had been inscribed on the inside of the band in cursive script. It read "Forever, M". My vision was instantly blurred by the tears that filled my eyes. "Oh, Mulder," I said, my voice choked by my tears. I threw my arms around his neck and I felt his arms wrap around my back. "I want you to know that I mean it, Scully," he whispered in my ear. "I mean forever." I already believed that Mulder meant his promise to be, but this gesture made my heart ache. He was so sweet and gentle with me. I hoped with all of my heart that someday his feelings for me would become as passionate as the feelings that I had for him. But I had no reason to complain. Most women would give their right arms for a man who cared for them the way Mulder cared for me. Passion may fade, but I knew that Mulder would continue to love and respect me, just as he promised he would. We were still embracing when I heard Megan begin to fuss on the baby monitor. "I should go get her," I said, my voice still rough. "What can I do here?" he asked. "Just finish filling up the tray with applesauce and then stick it in the freezer, please," I instructed. I gently put the ring back into the velvet box and Mulder slipped it back into his pocket. The rest of the afternoon and evening passed quickly. My mother was right; with meals and bottles and bath time, neither Mulder or I had much time to do anything else. Mulder put Megan to bed and I read to Jordan. We wanted them to get used to both of us. When I finished with Jordan, Mulder was already downstairs watching TV. He flicked it off when I came into the room. "You can keep watching, Mulder, I don't mind," I smiled at him. "I was just killing time until you got back," he told me. He was quiet for a moment and then took a deep breath. "So tomorrow's the big day." "Are you having seconds thoughts?" I inquired. "Not one, Scully. We are doing the right thing. I have never been more certain of anything in my life," he said without skipping a beat. "You aren't having any second thoughts, are you?" "Only one," I said, trying to keep a straight face. "What?" he asked, concern evident in his voice. I put my hand on his and smiled, "We should have waited until after we were married to tell my mother." "Don't take this away from her, Scully," Mulder chided. "You'll only get married once, at least I hope you will, so let her have her fun. Don't cheat her out of anything." "I was kidding, Mulder. It's just a bit much, that's all," I told him. "Can you imagine what she would have been like if she'd had time to plan a big wedding?" I added with a laugh. Mulder smiled, but fell silent. I got the distinct impression that there was something that he wanted to say. "What is it Mulder?" I prompted. "I feel like I've cheated you, Scully," he frowned. "I don't imagine that this is how you pictured your wedding." "I didn't have my heart set on anything in particular," I tried to console him. "But I don't want you to miss out on anything," he fretted. "I'm not missing out, Mulder. What more could I ask for?" "Oh, I don't know, an engagement that's longer than five minutes, your family at your wedding..." he began his list. He had obviously been thinking about this. It warmed my heart to know that Mulder had even thought about those kind of details. "Mulder, things don't always work out the way that we expect. I can assure you that this is not what I expected, but I doubt that you planned on an instant family either," I pointed out. "In this case things have turned out far better than I expected. This is exactly what I've always wanted. It may not be how I thought I would end up here, but this is precisely where I always wanted to be." Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out another velvet box; slightly smaller than the first. Then he knelt down in front of me. "What are you doing, Mulder?" "Something right for a change, I hope," he said shakily. Opening the box, he withdrew another ring. "Dana Scully, will you marry me?" he asked, slipping the ring onto my finger. "Oh Mulder," I breathed, "How could you possibly think that you've cheated me out of anything? You've given me more than I ever could have hoped for." He brought my hand to his lips and kissed it gently. "I only want to give you what you deserve," he smiled and pressed his lips to my hand again. "Do you like it?" The ring was a diamond solitaire; the stone perched delicately above the band which had been etched to match the wedding rings. "Like it? No, Mulder, I love it," I smiled at him. "C'mere," I said softly and when he rose up on his knees, I kissed him lightly on the lips. "I'm glad you like it," he said gently and pulled me into a tight hug. I relished the warmth of his embrace for a few moments and then whispered into his ear, "I know it's early, Mulder, but it's been a long day and tomorrow is going to be even longer." "I know, Scully," he chuckled. "I was just thinking the same thing. Let's hit the sack." It wasn't even 11 when we turned out the lights. The alarm was set for 7 and I could hear Megan breathing softly through the monitor. It felt like I had just closed my eyes when Megan's cries woke me. I was quite surprised to find Mulder's arm wrapped around my waist. When I tried to slide out of the bed, he pulled me closer. "Don't go," he murmured sleepily. "I have to give Megan her bottle," I told him gently. "Sorry," he mumbled, moving his arm. In half an hour I had fed and changed Megan and put her back in her crib. I was almost asleep again when I crawled back into bed. I reached behind me to grab the covers, but I missed. I ended up with a handful of very aroused Mulder instead. Groaning at the contact, he pressed himself against my hand. "Sorry, Mulder," was all that I could think to say. When I attempted to release my grip, his hand covered mine and he moved my hand along his erection. "Don't stop, Scully," his voice was raspy. I could feel him throbbing through the fabric of his boxers. It felt glorious, but I couldn't do anything for him with my arm at this angle. "Roll over, Mulder," I said gently. "Please, Scully," he pleaded. "Mulder, my arm doesn't bend this way. Roll over," I instructed. When he had moved to his other side I laid behind him and reached over him. He groaned again when my hand made contact. After stroking him lightly through his boxers a few times, he exhaled sharply when I reached inside. His cock was hot and hard. His skin was stretched so tightly that it felt like silk. Running my hand along his shaft lightly, I tried to commit every nuance of his hardness to memory. I wondered if he noticed that my breathing had altered as much as his own had. When I ran my thumb over the head of his cock, I was pleased to discover a large drop of his natural lubricant. Swirling my thumb, I spread his moisture around, gathering and spreading more and more until my hand slid easily up and down his shaft. "Scully," he said slowly. "God, that feels good." "Mmm," I agreed. His breathing became even more labored; he was getting close. He began to thrust into my hand. "Let me do the work, Mulder," I whispered. "God, Scully," he panted. On every stroke, I ended by circling the rim of his cock with my fingers. He began to moan constantly. When I felt his cock pulse, I continued to stroke him through his orgasm, my stomach fluttering when he called my name. I waited for his breathing to begin to return to normal before I slipped to the bathroom. After I got back into bed, Mulder slid out of bed too. He got back into bed quietly. "I'm sorry, Scully." "Mulder, *I* grabbed you," I chuckled. "Yeah, but I--" "It's okay, really," I assured him. "It felt so good, I didn't want you to stop. I shouldn't have made you..." "Mulder, you didn't *make* me do anything. And as I recall, you did say please," I reminded him. "Is that all it takes, Scully? I wish I'd known that sooner," he sounded amused. "Go to sleep, Mulder. We have a busy day ahead of us tomorrow," I ignored his comment. This time I made sure that I had the blankets when I reached for them. "Night, honeybunch," he chuckled drowsily. "Night, poopyhead." I smiled to myself as I pulled the covers over my shoulder. I was exhausted, but now there was a relentless throbbing between my legs and I couldn't very well do anything about it with Mulder lying next to me. When I tried to think about other things, the memory of the sound of his voice pleading with me to continue kept insinuating itself into my thoughts. Somehow I managed to fall back to sleep, the ache between my thighs having dwindled to a dull roar. The alarm jolted me awake again. I showered first and while I dried my hair, Mulder had his shower. I had just turned off my blow dryer when I heard the front doorbell ring. Mulder stepped out of the shower with a towel around his waist. I couldn't stop myself from letting my eyes wander over his chest and stomach. "I'll go let my mother in," I told him. Before I made it out of the bathroom, I heard Megan start to whimper. "I'll get her," Mulder nodded at me, "You go let your mother in." When I opened the front door my mother wasn't there, but there were some boxes sitting on the porch. I picked them up and carried them to the dining room. As I was walking back to the front door, I met my mother carrying a platter. "Where's Fox, dear? I'll need his help bring in some things." "What things?" "More flowers and food, the dress and a few other things," she informed me with a smile. Mulder came downstairs with Megan just as she was finishing. "Fox," she smiled. "Could you help me bring some things in from the car?" "Sure, Mrs. Scully," he said, handing the baby to me. I was giving Megan her breakfast when they finished. Mulder started a pot of coffee and made some toast. Just as my mother was telling me that it was time to start my hair, a pajama-clad Jordan wandered into the kitchen. Mulder assured me that he would be able to handle the kids. The rest of the morning passed in a haze with a flurry of doing hair and make-up. Then we had to make sure that I had something old; we decided that my shoes would do. Something new; I thought my ring would suffice, but even though my mother thought it was gorgeous, she said it didn't count and she was on the lookout for something else. Something borrowed; my mother's wedding dress fit the bill. And something blue; which we thought we might not be able to fill until I remembered my pair of pale blue panties. My mother had done my hair in cascading curls all over my head, as she was wont to do whenever I let her get near it. Then she pinned baby's breath into one upswept side. When I was finally satisfied with my appearance, with the exception of my hair, I shook my head at her. "Why were you in such a hurry, Mom? Now I'm going to have to wait all of this time and not even be able to sit without worrying about wrinkling my dress." "Dana, it's 10:30," she informed me. "10:30," I gasped, "Where did the time go?" A sharp knock made us both look at the door. "Who is it?" my mother called. "It's me," Mulder's voice answered. My mother hurried over to the door. Opening it just a crack, she peered out. "Fox, you really shouldn't see Dana before the wedding. You shared a bed last night--that's bad enough." I heard Mulder say something, but I couldn't make it out. My mother opened the door and slipped into the hall. A few seconds later Mulder walked in. He stopped short when he saw me. "Scully," he breathed, "You look stunning." "Thank you, Mulder." I could feel myself blushing. "You look handsome, too." He was dressed in a dark suit with a white shirt and dark grey tie. I wondered briefly when he had taken his clothes, because I didn't remember him being in the room at all. But he could have come in when I was in the bathroom. "I have something for you," he said walking towards me. I stared in disbelief when he pulled yet another velvet box from his jacket pocket. It was no wonder he had been so long at the jewelry store. "Mulder, what else have you bought?" "A wedding present," he smiled, handing me the box. Inside was a fine gold chain and suspended from it was a diamond encrusted floating heart. "Mulder, I didn't get you anything," I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I blinked furiously trying to prevent them from spilling over and ruining my make-up. "When would you have had time?" he smiled. "And besides, Scully, you've already given me the only thing that I could have asked for." "What's that?" I asked quietly. "You said yes," he smiled. Then taking the chain from the box, he put it around my neck. "Your mother only agreed to let me in because she said it would be something new," he added with a shrug. "It's beautiful, Mulder. Thank you," I breathed. It sounded woefully inadequate, but I didn't know what else to say. "No one will even notice it, Scully. They won't be able to take their eyes off of you." My mother knocked on the door and came back into the room. She hurried Mulder out, and after some last minute fussing with my hair, she said it was time. It didn't seem real standing in the living room of the Prescott's home. The room had been decorated with flowers and someone was taking pictures. Everything seemed brighter than normal, and my ears were filled with white noise. It was actually happening; I was standing there beside Mulder, repeating the words of the priest. Then I heard Father McCue saying, "You may kiss the bride," and Mulder was leaning towards me. When I lifted my face up, I couldn't decipher what I saw in his eyes. It almost looked like reverence, but I decided that my judgement must be clouded by my own feelings. "You are so beautiful," he whispered before his lips met mine. I was expecting him to give me a quick peck, so I was shocked when I felt his tongue against my lips. Instinctively, I opened my mouth to him. When our tongues met, my knees gave way and I had to lean against him for support. Finally we had to break the kiss to get some air. Why had Mulder kissed me like that? My knees were still shaky. I knew that he wanted to convince everyone that we were in love, but that went a bit overboard. My cheeks were flaming; I was the blushing bride, how embarassing. I heard Father McCue introduce us as Mr. and Mrs. Mulder, and that was it, we were married. The afternoon proved to be as surreal as the morning had been. Everyone stood around talking and laughing. At first I thought that my mother had brought far too much food, but as the afternoon passed, the platters emptied to almost nothing. I'd forgotten how much the Gunmen could put away, and Skinner surprised me by putting the Gunmen to shame. I remember participating in several conversations, but I have almost no recollection of what was said. I saw Mulder in what looked like a serious tete-a-tete with Skinner but I forgot to ask him what it was about. No one would let me hold or feed the children, claiming that I would ruin my dress. Someone had given Frohike a camera and he wasn't shy about using it. My pupils were having a hard time adjusting to the constant flashes in my face. Mulder noticed that I seemed to be in a daze and asked me if I was all right. Apparently he found my answer of "I'm fine," quite amusing because he kissed me and laughed, "I'm glad to see that marriage hasn't changed you." I assured him that it was all just a bit overwhelming and that when everything was back to normal, I'd be okay. After that he stayed close to me, encouraging me to sit or eat with every other sentence. If it hadn't been so endearing, it would have been very annoying. Since Sheila Wesley's daughter was the only eligible female, my mother saying that she'd had *her* turn, we decided to forego throwing the bouquet and I simply handed the flowers to Sarah. Frohike was bitterly disappointed that I wasn't wearing a garter. That was one detail that had slipped everyone's mind, much to my relief. Mulder promised Frohike a special surprise to help him get over it. When his eyes lit up, I assured him that it would *not* be a copy of our honeymoon video. He looked dejected again until Mulder slapped him on the back and told him that he was now the proud owner of the infamous Fox Mulder Video Collection. By 6 o'clock everyone had gone and Mulder and I were alone with the kids again. When I promised to have my mother's dress back to her after I'd had it cleaned, she told me that the dress was mine now. I argued that it wouldn't be borrowed then, but she smiled and said that I could consider myself to be looking after it for Megan. The evening flew by again with feeding, bathing and getting the kids to bed. When Mulder came downstairs after reading to Jordan, he announced that he was going for a run. "It's been a while. You don't mind, do you?" "Of course not," I said with a wave of my hand. "I think I'm going to take a bath anyway." After changing to his running gear, Mulder stopped in the living room again. "I'm not sure how long I'll be. I have to find a new route," he explained. "Okay," I smiled. "See you in a bit." It was a good fifteen minutes before I got up the energy to get off the couch again and go upstairs. Setting the baby monitor on the vanity, I filled the tub and added some foaming milk bath. I sank into the tub with a sigh and let the hot water relax me completely. As I soaked in the fragrant bubbles my mind began to run through the events of the day. It still hadn't begun to sink in; my stomach fluttered every time I remembered that Mulder and I were married. When I remembered how Mulder had kissed me, a tingle started between my legs. Then I let my mind wander back to what had happened the previous night and the tingle became more persistent. I couldn't ignore it; I didn't want to. My nipples tightened as I skimmed my hands over them. I slid my hands past my belly and let my right hand slip between my thighs. I brought my left back up to my breast in an attempt to ease the growing ache there. As my fingers began to circle my now throbbing bundle of nerves, I once again allowed my mind to drift. The memory of Mulder's tongue against my lips made them fairly burn. The gentle caress of his tongue against mine fanned the fire in my core. When I recalled how hot and hard Mulder had felt in my hand, something within me surged. As I remembered the sound of my name on his lips when he came, I went plummeting over the edge. My clit jumped and pulsed under my fingers, white lights flashed behind my eyes and I murmured his name. I'd died many little deaths thinking of Mulder, but recent events had made this the deadliest of all. A knock at the door almost made me jump out of my flushed skin. "Are you almost done, Scully?" "What?" I asked in a daze. "Are you almost finished your bath, or should I go shower in the other bathroom?" "No, I'm done," I called. "Just give me a second." My hands were shaking as I got out of the tub. What had Mulder heard? Probably nothing, I tried to convince myself. I was sure that I hadn't been loud, I'm usually not. When I left the bathroom Mulder was standing next to the bed. "Good run?" I asked. "Not bad," he shrugged. "But next time I think I'll make it a little longer." His hair was damp with sweat; his t-shirt almost drenched. The sweat on his legs glistened in the lamplight. God, I had it bad. Even like this he made my pulse quicken. While he showered I changed into my pajamas and crawled into bed. It was barely after 10, but I was exhausted. Mulder was back quickly. I've never figured out how he could be done so fast. Granted I had more hair than he did, but he had far more body. He was out of the shower before I would have even had a chance to get thoroughly wet. I guess it was one of life's little mysteries. "I'm still pumped from my run, Scully," he told me as he pulled a pair of boxers on under his towel. "I think I'll go and watch some TV." "Good night then, Mulder," I said sleepily. "I'm wiped, and with having to get up with Megan..." "I could get up," he offered. "That's okay, Mulder," I smiled. "But thank you for offering. I'll still wake up when she cries, so there's no point really." "But I don't want to stick you with all of the night time feedings." He looked genuinely worried. "I don't mind, Mulder, honestly. I enjoy that time with her; the closeness and the peacefulness. I find it very intimate," I promised him. "But don't worry, you'll have your share of dirty diapers to change." "Thanks," he laughed. "Goodnight, honeybunch." "Night, poopyhead," I laughed with him. It was odd, I thought as I got comfortable, I was sure that I'd seen tears shining in Mulder's eyes, but I had no idea why. It must have been a trick of the light. Not too long after my head hit the pillow, I was out like a light. When Megan's cries woke me, I was surprised to find that Mulder wasn't in the bed. I discovered him asleep on the couch with the TV still on when I went downstairs with Megan to get her bottle. I went back upstairs and fed Megan in the rocking chair in her room. Once she was settled again I grabbed a spare blanket from the linen closet. After putting the bottle back in the kitchen I covered Mulder up and turned off the TV. As I was crawling back into bed it suddenly occurred to me that this was my wedding night and it certainly wasn't how I pictured it. But for the past 7 years little had turned out as I'd expected. I hadn't really expected anything to happen anyway, although I hoped it might eventually. Before the clock radio began to play in the morning, I was wakened by the click of the bathroom door as it shut. A minute or so later Mulder came out of the bathroom. I opened one eye to look at him. "Did I wake you, Scully?" "Mmm, but that's okay, Mulder. The alarm will be going off soon anyway." "Why didn't you wake me up last night?" he asked as he sat down on the bed beside me. "You were sleeping so peacefully, I didn't have the heart to," I told him. "Scully," he said gently. "We are going to have to get into the habit of sleeping together. What if Jordan had found me there and then it came out when he was talking to the social worker?" "I didn't think of that, Mulder. I thought that you might be more comfortable there," I admitted. "More comfortable? Hardly!" he laughed. "You always used to sleep on *your* couch," I pointed out. "Yeah, but there was no one waiting in my bed for me to spoon up to," he waggled his eyebrows at me. "I thought that you might be afraid that I would assault you again," I confessed quietly. Mulder threw his head back and laughed, "Scully, you can assault me like that anytime your heart desires." "Mulder," I rolled my eyes, "You'll wake the kids." "Oh, they'll be up soon anyway," he laughed. "Do you want me to make breakfast? I could make pancakes." "That would be nice," I smiled. "Oh, and Mulder," I stopped him before he got up, "I wouldn't mind if you wanted to put a TV in here to help you get to sleep. It certainly won't keep me up." "Are you sure?" he asked in surprise. "Of course, I'm sure," I said in consternation. "Maybe tomorrow I'll stop by my apartment and pick up mine. I have some errands to run anyway," he said happily. "I'm just going to have a quick shower," I told him. "Will you listen for Megan?" "Sure," he agreed quickly. "But you just had a bath last night." "I didn't wash my hair though and I'm sure it looks pretty bad." "Well," he laughed, "It does look like a bit of a rat's nest." "Shut up, Mulder," I swatted at him, but he scooted out of the way. "You'll have to be faster than that to get me, Scully," he smirked. "I didn't have to be very fast the other night," I said smugly. Mulder opened his mouth to say something, but shut it again. I think I may have even detected a hint of pink in his cheeks. "I'm going to start breakfast," he informed me, getting up quickly. I'd embarrassed Mulder. If I'd kept a diary, I would have written it down. When I went down for breakfast, Mulder surprised me by giving me a good-morning kiss. He was serious about the picture that he wanted to present to Jordan and I understood completely. I didn't mind being kissed either. Mulder did a wonderful job with breakfast. Jordan ate as many pancakes as I did. Sheila wasn't kidding that he was a good eater. Since Mulder had done the cooking, I did the cleaning. He had the kids in the living room with him, so I decided to finish making the baby food that I had started on Friday. I was filling up an icecube tray with peaches when Mulder appeared in the kitchen with a very sleepy baby. "I'll take her up," he said quietly. "I just came for her bottle," he explained when I put my spoon down. "Jordan's watching TV. He should be fine." Through the monitor I could hear Mulder feeding Megan and putting her in her crib. He was back quickly, putting the half-empty bottle back on the counter. "She goes down so easily," he smiled. "She's a little angel," I returned his smile. After finishing with the peaches, I did up some pears and when I was done with those, I decided to wash the kitchen floor. Even though I'd washed it Thursday night, with the two kids and all of the activity yesterday it was starting to get sticky again. Just as I was finishing, Mulder and Jordan came in asking what was for lunch. It seemed to me that we had just had breakfast so I glanced up at the clock. It was 11:55. As if on cue, Megan started to fuss upstairs. "I'll go," Mulder smiled. I asked Jordan what he wanted for lunch and he requested macaroni and cheese. As I was filling up the pot to cook the macaroni I heard Mulder on the monitor talking to Megan. "Hello beautiful," he said softly. She stopped whimpering. "Did you have a good sleep, sweetheart?" It secretly thrilled me that he interacted like this with Megan. I was sure that Mulder had forgotten that we could hear him. "I bet I should change your diaper," I heard him lift Megan out of the crib. "I think I've been letting your new mommy do that too much." Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jordan look towards the monitor. I prayed that he hadn't heard what Mulder had said or didn't understand. "Are you *my* new mommy too, Dana?" he asked curiously. "Aren't my old mom and dad coming back?" I realized that I had no idea what he'd been told. As I turned to face him, I tried desperately to blink back the tears that had sprung to my eyes. "Why does everyone get sad when I ask that?" he looked puzzled. "Who did you ask?" I wanted to know. "Mrs. Wesley and Sarah," he told me. "What did they say?" "Sarah just started to cry, and Mrs. Wesley said we would talk about it later, but we never did." "Well, Jordan, everyone gets sad, because something very sad happened and they don't want you to feel sad," I tried to explain. "Is the sad thing that they aren't coming back?" "Yes, Jordan." "But why aren't they coming back? Where did they go?" His bottom lip was quivering. I should have prepared myself for this question, but I'd been too busy worry about all of the changes in my own life to think about it. I decided on the spot to be honest with him. "They didn't want to go away, Jordan. Something bad happened and they got hurt. The doctors tried to make them better but they were too badly hurt." I drew on my residency training to try to explain it to him. "They died?" he asked quietly. "Yes, they did, Jordan. I'm sorry." "And you and Mulder are my new mom and dad?" he was inquisitive. "Your mom and dad asked Mulder a long time ago to be your dad if anything ever happened to them. Then Mulder asked me to be your mom. But your grandma and grandpa want to be your mom and dad, too," I decided to tell him. "I don't like them," he wrinkled his nose. "I like you and Mulder." "Mulder and I like you, too, Jordan and we want to be your mom and dad, but someone else will make the final decision." "Who?" "A judge." I told him. "I don't want you and Mulder to go away, too." His bottom lip began to tremble again. "C'mere, Jordan," I sat down and patted my knee. He climbed up and I gave him a hug. "Mulder and I will fight very hard to keep you and that's a promise, but we will have to do what the judge says." Jordan nodded solemnly. "The judge already decided that Mulder and I will probably get to keep you, but we had to do a few things if we are going to get to keep you," I tried to help him understand. "Like what?" "Well, we had to get married," I began. "You already did that," he smiled. "Yes, we did. We also have to prove that we can be good parents. As long as we do that, I'm pretty sure that the judge will let us be your new parents forever." "Okay," he said quietly. After giving him another squeeze I said, "If you have anymore questions, Jordan, Mulder and I will do our best to answer them for you." When Jordan slid off of my lap, I spied Mulder standing in the doorway holding Megan. I'm not sure how long he'd been there, but judging from the look on his face, it was long enough. He put Megan in her high chair. I'd gone back to the stove to cook the macaroni. "What brought that on?" Mulder whispered when he'd joined me at the stove. "He heard you talking to Megan on the monitor," I said softly. Mulder's eyes grew wide and he groaned. "It's okay, Mulder. It's probably for the best actually," I tried to console him. "God, Scully, are you sure?" "I think he may still have some problems and I might have been too open with him, I'm not sure. We'll have to wait and see." Lunch passed without incident. While the kids slept, Mulder told me about his plans for Monday. We were sitting at the kitchen table having coffee while we talked. Skinner wanted Mulder to come in to get some paperwork that we needed to sign. "I've been thinking about that, Mulder," I told him when we began to discuss the leaves of absence that we would take. "I think that maybe I should stay home at least until the custody hearing and maybe longer." "Is that what you want to do?" he asked in surprise. "I really think Megan and Jordan need some stability in their lives; especially Jordan," I explained. "I think that they do, too, but I don't want you to feel pressured into doing this, Scully." "To be honest, Mulder, I was feeling more pressure about returning to work," I admitted. "From me?" He looked shocked. "No, not from you, Mulder," I chuckled. "It's more societal, I guess. People wonder why a woman would choose to stay at home to *just* look after the kids, when she could be out doing something more productive." "If it matters to you, Scully, I think that staying home with the kids can be very productive, as long as it's what you want to do. For a long time women felt pressured to stay at home when it wasn't what they wanted to do and that's not a healthy environment for children." "Of course it matters to me what you think, Mulder. We have to discuss this kind of thing now--make decisions together," I reminded him. "So, we agree on this then?" "I want you to do what you feel is right. And I'll kick anyone's ass who questions your decision." "Now that we're married are you officially my knight in shining armor?" I laughed. "Officially, yes, but I always thought I was anyway," he admitted sheepishly. "I never noticed," I rolled my eyes. I got up from the table and began to rummage through the fridge looking for the roast beef that we'd bought on Friday. "Sunday roast beef dinner," I smiled when I pulled it out. "Isn't that a lot of work?" he asked. "Not really," I shrugged. "I was just wondering because I thought that we could take the kids to the park when they wake up," he informed me. "We'll still have time to do that. The roast will be fine," I told him as I as turned the oven on to preheat. "I'll just get the vegetables ready to go and then start them when we get back." "What can I do to help," he asked getting up from the table. "You could peel the potatoes," I suggested. While Mulder and I got everything ready we continued to chat. He told me that he would drop off Frohike's consolation prize tomorrow after he picked up his TV. I was surprised that Mulder was giving up his collection so soon. I hadn't expected him to turn it over until after we had full custody. But he had promised. It made me wonder how Mulder planned to get rid of his sexual energy. After last night, maybe he thought that things were changing between us. I know that I hoped they were. When I tuned back into the conversation Mulder was telling me about the park that he had discovered when he was out for his run. Once again, after Megan and Jordan woke up, the remainder of the day flew past. By the time they were in bed for the night, I was happy to collapse onto the couch. Mulder decided not to go for a run, opting to just sit and watch TV instead. There wasn't much of interest to watch on Sunday night and Mulder ended up stopping on a program about the occult. This time it was my turn to fall asleep on the couch. I was so exhausted that I didn't wake up until Mulder laid me on the bed. "You fell asleep," Mulder said when I blinked at him in confusion. I was so groggy that I skipped most of my bedtime routine so that I could crawl into bed. Mulder had barely flicked the light off when a piercing cry jolted me completely awake. "Jordan," Mulder and I said in unison. We both went to his room. He was sitting up in his bed, shaking like a leaf. "Did you have a bad dream?" I asked, remembering our earlier conversation. "Yes," he whimpered. "Do you want to talk about it?" Mulder asked him. "No," he shook his head. "Can I sleep with you?" "Of course," I smiled. Mulder carried him back to our bed. It didn't take long for him to settle and soon he had fallen back to sleep. I, however, was wide awake. I couldn't help thinking about what Jordan and I talked about earlier. I knew that it must have contributed to his nightmare. Part of me realized that dreams were a natural way of dealing with trauma, but most of me was wracked with guilt from the knowledge that I had brought this on. Eventually I drifted back to sleep. When I got up with Megan, Jordan was still sleeping soundly in the middle of the bed. After I fed Megan and came back to the bedroom, I was startled to find that Jordan was gone. But before I could ask, Mulder told me. "I took Jordan back to his own bed. We shouldn't let him get used to sleeping with us." "You're right," I agreed. "Do you think he'll be confused when he wakes up in the morning?" "I don't think so. My parents always moved me back. Didn't yours?" "I always crawled in with Missy," I told him. "Don't worry, Scully, I'm sure he'll be fine," Mulder tried to reassure me. I nodded and slipped back into bed. Mulder spooned up to me immediately. "If he wakes up again, he can come back. Okay?" he whispered in my ear. "If he gets used to sleeping with us, we'll have a hard time breaking him of it." "I know, Mulder," I sighed. "It's just that I think that I brought this on by what I said to him this morning." "You probably did, but I don't think that it's a bad thing. I think it would've done more harm than good to leave him in the dark." My eyes burned with tears and I couldn't stop them from spilling onto my pillow. Mulder must have known that I was crying because he turned me towards him and pulled me into a tight hug. "I honestly think that you did the right thing, Scully. Sometimes what's best isn't always what's easy," he tried to calm me. Continuing to hold me tightly, he began to place feathery kisses on my face. I slowly began to relax. "What if the judge ends up giving him to the Barnes after we've managed to help him deal with all of this -- after he's become dependent on us?" I asked, my voice still shaky. "That's why we have to do whatever it takes, Scully." "I don't know what I'll do if we lose them, Mulder. I love them so much already." "I knew that you would give your heart to these kids, Scully, and I think that as long as we are in this together, everything will be fine." "Together," I nodded against his shoulder. I fell asleep snuggled in Mulder's arms and woke the same way. We were already into a bit of a routine, with me showering first and Mulder showering while I dried my hair. Before I was done, he was at his sink, shaving. I heard Megan before I went downstairs, so I took her with me. Jordan showed up in the kitchen shortly after us, and Mulder was right, he asked no questions about the previous night. Mulder appeared next, in a shirt and tie. "Are you going to work?" Jordan asked. "Just for a little while," Mulder smiled at him. "But Dana will stay here with us?" he glanced at me, looking a little worried. "Yes, I'm staying here, Jordan," I assured him. "I thought that after breakfast we could go for a walk and you could show me the neighborhood." "Okay," he agreed with a smile. "Could we go to the park again?" "I think that's a good idea," I smiled. I was feeding Megan her applesauce and cereal when Mulder announced that it was time to kiss his girls. He planted a big kiss on me and then on Megan. Next he turned to Jordan. "Can I kiss you, too?" "I'm not a girl," Jordan pulled a face. "Can I kiss you anyway?" Mulder laughed. "Okay," Jordan consented with a roll of his eyes. "I should get going, Scully. Skinner wanted to do this first thing--he's in meetings all day. I should be back around noon, but I'll call you and let you know for sure," Mulder told me when he straightened up from kissing Jordan. "You haven't had any breakfast," I protested. "At least take some toast and I'll give you some coffee in a travel mug." I got up and collected everything for him quickly. After I handed it all to him, he leaned over and kissed me again. "Thanks, Scully," he said softly and I felt my cheeks flushing. "I'll call you later." After we'd finished breakfast and I'd dressed the kids, I packed what I needed in a diaper bag and we headed out. At the park Megan was content briefly in the swings, but she soon began to droop. Jordan played on the jungle gym while I fed her a bottle. I'd just settled her in the stroller, sound asleep, when my cell phone rang. "Hi, it's me," Mulder said when I answered. "How's it going?" I asked, keeping my eye on Jordan. The bright red t-shirt I'd dressed him in made him easier to keep track of. "I've finished at work, and I'm on my way to my apartment," he told me. "I just called to tell you that I'm going to be later than I thought. My lawyer just called and he wants to meet with me." "What about?" I asked in concern. "Something about the custody hearing," he informed me. "But he assured me that it wasn't bad news, just something that we needed to discuss in person." "Oh, okay," I heaved a sigh of relief. "I should be home around 1:30," he promised. I was going to be on pins and needles until he got home. I knew that he'd said nothing was wrong, but I couldn't stop myself from worrying. We left the park at 11 so that I could make lunch. All the way home and all through lunch my mind was racing. I couldn't stop thinking about what might be wrong. I made myself some lunch, but I didn't eat more than a couple of bites. After the kids went down for their naps, I paced until I heard Mulder's car pull into the driveway. He walked into the house looking paler than the day he'd asked me to marry him. "What is it, Mulder? What did your lawyer say?" The look on his face had me scared. "Let's sit down, Scully," he said, ushering me towards the couch by putting his hand on the small of my back. When we sat down, Mulder immediately looked at his hands. I knew that meant he was afraid to tell me. "Whatever it is, Mulder, it'll be better if you just come out with it," I urged him. He took a deep breath. "The Barnes have already informed the court that they are contesting our custody, saying that we have a marriage of convenience." "So we'll say it isn't." It sounded perfectly reasonable to me. "Scully, I was told to expect some *very* personal questions from the social worker." My heart started to flutter immediately. "What are we going to do, Mulder?" "As I see it, Scully, we have three choices," he said quietly. I looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to continue. "We can call it off; annul the marriage," he began. "No," I said flatly, "I will not give up." "We could lie to the social worker," he went on. "You know how I feel about lying, Mulder." "There's only one other thing I can think of," he looked at his hands again. "What, Mulder? There has to be a better option." Clearing his throat, he shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "What are you afraid to say, Mulder," I prompted him. "Just tell me." "We could consummate the marriage." The words spilled out of his mouth quickly. I didn't know what to say. My heart was pounding. Consummate the marriage? Have sex with Mulder? He was right though, I couldn't think of another way either. "Okay," I nodded. "Okay?" He sounded amazed. "I can't think of anything else that we can do. I can't quit now and I won't lie," I reminded him. "It's the only thing I could come up with, Scully." The rest of the afternoon was tense. Mulder and I barely spoke. I was so nervous that the smallest sound made me jump. While I was getting ready to make supper Mulder came into the kitchen, turned off the water that I was running, took me by the shoulders and turned me towards him. "Look what this is doing to us, Scully. I think we should call it off. I don't want you to feel pressured into doing something that you're uncomfortable with," he told me softly. "I am a little nervous, Mulder, but I think we have to do this," I told him. "As long as you're sure, Scully." "I'm very sure, Mulder. But if it's making you uncomfortable--" "Scully," he interrupted me, pulling me close, "I want to make this work as much as you do. I just want you to be okay with it." "I trust you, Mulder. I know that everything will be okay," I said, laying my head against his chest. His arms tightened around me and he pressed a kiss against my hair. "I promise that I will make everything okay." After the kids had been in bed for a while, I told Mulder that I was going upstairs. He got up to follow me. "Give me a few minutes, okay?" I asked. "Sure," he smiled anxiously. Once upstairs I brushed my teeth and pulled on a nightie that I rarely wore. I stared at myself in the mirror for a minute or so. I looked pale and my eyes were wide and still. As I was pulling back the covers Mulder came into the room and smiled at me, looking as shaky as I felt. I slid into bed and closed my eyes. When I felt the bed dip, I opened them again. "Do you want me to turn off the light?" he asked quietly. "No, it's fine, Mulder," I tried to smile at him. He drew a deep breath. "I want you to know before we go any further that I do love you, Scully. I don't want you to ever question that." "I know," I whispered. Lying next to me on his side, he reached out to caress my cheek. As he did, I felt his erection press into my hip. And I'd been worried that he might need some coaxing. "Are you ready?" he asked softly. I couldn't help giggling. "What?" he sounded confused. "I just feel like a teenager who has planned her first time," I admitted. "I'm sorry that it's awkward," he apologized. "It's okay. C'mere," I urged him to move between my legs. When he was positioned above me with the head of his cock pressed against me, he gazed at me with such tenderness and concern that I fell in love with him all over again. Before he began to ease his way inside of me, he kissed me softly and told me again that he loved me. I wanted so much to tell him that I loved him too; that I loved him with my heart and soul; that I loved him with every inch of my being, but I couldn't. I was afraid of upsetting the delicate balance of our relationship. I'd pulled my knees back to allow him easier access, but when he began to enter me, I gasped. "Did I hurt you?" He stopped immediately. "Not at all," I promised him. "It's been awhile and well, I've never been with anyone that's as big as you." I wasn't about to tell him that I'd gasped from sheer ecstasy. "I'll stop if I'm hurting you." "I'll be fine, Mulder. The female vagina is designed to accommodate a baby's head, so unless your penis is bigger than--" "Scully!" he complained. "Too clinical?" "Mmm hmm." "Sorry, I didn't mean to ruin the mood," I laughed. Mulder chuckled with me and then bent to kiss me again. "I'll take it slowly, okay?" "Okay," I smiled. He was incredibly gentle. The long slow strokes he took felt heavenly. I kept my eyes closed so that he couldn't see my eyes rolling back in my head. His face was pressed against my cheek and neck. The roughness of his day's growth of beard, the scent of his skin, and the softness his hair only added to the sensory overload I was already experiencing. I wished that I hadn't worn anything to bed because I longed to feel all of his skin next to mine. Every part of me that *was* touching him felt like it had been thoroughly satiated after a long hunger. "You feel so good, Scully," he breathed in my ear. I let my hands wander over his back, caressing him gently. I wanted to tell him that I loved the way he filled me; that his breath on my neck made me shiver; that with every thrust I felt an incredible surge in my belly. I wanted to tell him that I'd never felt anything so absolutely perfect before in my life. But I was sure that if I did it would scare him. "It does feel good, Mulder," I said softly. At my words he quickened his pace, taking shorter, harder strokes. It felt incredible. Suddenly I became aware of a familiar tingling sensation; I was going to come. My internal muscles tightened, Mulder groaned in response and began to thrust even harder. My orgasm broke over me in a wave of electrically charged heat and I had to bite my lip to keep from calling out. Mulder was coming too, his body shuddering above mine, my name once again on his lips. I continued to caress his back, enjoying the feeling of his muscled frame and the contour of his waist. I had to will my hands not to slip lower to savor the curve of his ass. "I wasn't too rough, was I?" he asked when he opened his eyes. "Not at all, you were very gentle. It felt quite nice actually." He laughed and kissed me again. "I'm not usually aiming for nice, but in our case, I guess that means it went well." "I thought it went well," I told him. "Well, I thought it was better than nice," he said softly after he'd rolled off of me and adjusted our position so that we were spooning. "Wonderful, in my opinion." I didn't know what to say. I thought that it had been more than wonderful. I'd been holding back and still had a tremendous orgasm, but I couldn't tell him that. He seemed to have no problem being open about the fact that he'd enjoyed it, but I didn't let his words go to my head. Men often enjoyed sex without the benefit of love. It wasn't something that I could do; I needed to be in love to properly enjoy sex, but I couldn't tell him that. Soon Mulder's breathing pattern let me know that he'd fallen asleep. My entire body felt like it was glowing, but I felt strangely empty too, already missing having him inside of me. I wanted desperately to feel that again and I prayed that he would want to do this again soon. I felt like I'd been led to a vast pool of cool water, but I'd only been allowed a single sip and I was *very* thirsty. If Mulder truly enjoyed the sex as much as he said he did, maybe I'd be lucky enough to be allowed to drink to my fill. But I also knew that unless he grew to love me the way that I wanted him to, my thirst would never be quenched. All that I could do was pray that someday he would discover that his feelings for me had changed. I hoped that it wouldn't take too long, but if seven years of working with Mulder had taught me anything, it was patience. His arm was still wrapped snuggly around my waist and he was breathing softly in my ear. He was now truly my husband; we had consummated our marriage. Mulder was still clutching me tightly when I woke at 2 a.m. to feed Megan. He pulled me back twice before I managed to make him understand that I had to go. When I got back to the bedroom, Mulder had rolled to his back and was snoring lightly. I think that I had fallen back to sleep before I even lay down again. Megan's cooing began to stir me in the morning. It didn't take long for my brain to process that something was unusual about my pillow. Mulder's arm was wrapped around me again, but I wasn't on my side. It was just as I had feared the first night we slept together. I was almost lying on top of him with my head on his chest. When I tried to ease myself off of him he tightened his hold on me. "Morning," he said, his voice still rough with sleep. "Good morning, Mulder," I answered him. "Did you get a little lonely last night?" he teased. "No, I--, I don't--, I'm sorry," I sputtered and tried to move again, but he wouldn't let me. "I only have one complaint about this situation," he informed me. "Oh yeah, what's that?" I asked. "You're not naked." My heart skipped a beat and warmth immediately began to spread through me. It wasn't just his words, but the rich low tone of his voice as well. I didn't say anything, I couldn't; my voice had failed me. "Can I ask you a question, Scully?" he continued. "Sure," I answered through the frog in my throat. "Um...well...I'm not sure how to ask you this but...you thought last night was okay, right?" "Yes, Mulder, after we got over the initial awkwardness, it was fine. But I told you that already," I reassured him. "Um..that's not where I was going. I just wondered if that... well, 'cause you liked it and I *really* liked it, does it...um, does it have to be a one-time thing?" My heart started to pound furiously. He wanted more. I hoped my voice wouldn't betray how thrilled I was. "I guess not," I answered. "Really? I mean I don't want to pressure you into anything that you might be uncomfortable with, Scully." "Last night was uncomfortable at first, Mulder, but then it was fine. Besides, we *are* married." "Regular sex is supposed to be one of the benefits of marriage, but I didn't want to assume..." He let his voice trail off. Regular sex! He wanted to have sex on a regular basis. I was practically on fire from wanting him then and there. "I wasn't sure what you wanted," I told him honestly. "I want this to be a real marriage, Scully. Right from the start I hoped that eventually this might happen, but I certainly didn't think that it would happen this fast." So Mulder thought that eventually he would want a sexual relationship with me, but after last night he wanted one now. That was a good sign. "Scully?" he asked after a few moments. "Mmm hmm." "I was wondering if maybe we could, well...I'd really like to--" Megan chose this moment to decide that being patient wasn't working and she began to cry. "Sorry, Mulder," I chuckled. "But it seems that it's not up to me." He closed his eyes and groaned. He had pitched a pretty impressive tent. "If we'd started right away..." I pointed out. "That doesn't make me feel any better, Scully." "Sorry, Mulder," I giggled and tried to leave the bed, but he was still holding me tightly. "I'm assuming that we'll have plenty of time tonight?" His raspy voice sent shivers through me. "Plenty," I nodded, my own voice sounding somewhat sultry. "Good," he said hoarsely and then released his grip on me. I pulled on my robe and went to get Megan. My legs felt like jelly. I was seeing a side of Mulder that I'd never seen before. A side that apparently wanted to have sex with me; *really* wanted to have sex with me. Tonight seemed like an eternity away. I was sitting at the table with a cup of coffee, having already fed Megan, when Mulder appeared in the kitchen freshly showered and shaved. "Would you like some coffee?" I smiled up at him. He didn't answer me, instead he walked over to me and dropped to his knees beside me. "I'm sorry, Scully," he said softly. "What for?" I asked in confusion. "My behavior, I'm sorry I reacted like that." He hung his head. "Mulder, you've lost me. I have no idea what you're talking about," I assured him. "I went caveman on you, Scully," he explained. "This morning?" I asked in amusement. He nodded dejectedly. Leaning closer to him, I lowered my voice. "You were aroused, Mulder. I wasn't offended in the least." "I was sure you were going to hate me," he said rather shakily. Apparently in his lust he hadn't noticed the affect of his behavior on me. "Hardly, Mulder," I laughed. "So, do you want coffee or not?" Even though I thought that the day would drag due to my anticipation of the evening's event, it still went by fairly quickly. I looked after all of the paperwork that Mulder had brought home while he played with Megan and Jordan. It was easy enough to fill out and I finished it quickly, especially since Mulder wasn't helping me. After lunch Mulder cut the grass and I started on the mounds of laundry while the kids slept. Apparently the noise from the lawn mower wasn't enough to wake either of them. Once Jordan and Megan were up Mulder offered to make dinner. I stayed in the living room and colored with Jordan while Megan played in her exer-saucer. After a while, mouth-watering aromas began to waft into the living room. "Pizza!" Jordan exclaimed. Mulder had often mentioned his pizza making prowess to me and he was finally putting his money where his mouth was. If the smells coming out of the kitchen were any indication, he hadn't been exaggerating. Before long, Jordan had lost interest in coloring and went to the kitchen to help Mulder. Megan and I stayed and she watched me as I began to fold clothes. I wouldn't go so long without doing laundry again. I'd been used to doing it once a week. Now I was going to have to do it every other day, at least. I only had one more basket to go when Mulder announced that supper was ready. He'd not only made pizza, but a salad to go with it. After I'd settled Megan into her high chair, I started to pull her towards me, so that I could feed her. "I'll feed Megan," Mulder piped up. "You just enjoy your pizza." "I don't mind--" I began. "Scully, you always feed her and try to eat at the same time. When you cook, you want me to enjoy what you make, don't you?" "Well, yes," I admitted. "And I want you to enjoy what I made," he told me. I couldn't say enough about Mulder's pizza. It was delicious. The crust was tender and he'd topped it with pepperoni, mushrooms and green peppers, just the way I like it. I was on my second piece when I noticed that Jordan kept squirming in his chair, glancing at Mulder and trying not to giggle, unsuccessfully. Mulder kept his expression serious and shook his head at Jordan. "Okay, what's going on?" I asked. "Nothing," Mulder said, his face the picture of innocence. Jordan tried to wipe the grin off of his face. "Do I have pizza sauce on my nose?" I asked, reaching for my napkin. "No!" Jordan giggled. "Then what is it? Spill, you two!" Jordan looked to Mulder for permission and he gave it with a small nod of his head. "It's supposed to be a surprise," Jordan whispered. "What is?" I whispered back. "I have to wait until after supper to tell you," he explained. "Okay," I chuckled. Even with all of his squirming, Jordan still managed to eat more pizza than me. When I put my salad fork down, Jordan squealed, "She's done! She's done." I had to laugh. "Okay, what's this surprise?" "Ice cream!" Jordan clapped his hands. "Ice cream?" I looked at Mulder. "When did you buy ice cream?" "We're going out," Jordan informed me excitedly. "Okay," I laughed again. "Let's get the kitchen cleaned up first, and then I'll get Megan's diaper bag ready to go." "I'll clean up," Mulder offered. "But you cooked," I argued. "And I have absolutely no idea what to put in a diaper bag," he countered. In fifteen minutes we were pulling out of the driveway. Mulder drove to a mini-mall that was about ten minutes away. In one corner sat a small establishment sporting a brightly colored sign that read "Willow Creek Dairy". Inside, it looked like an old-fashioned ice cream shop with large booths and stools along the counter. There was a short line ahead of us, lots of empty booths and I spied some high chairs in the corner. "I'll go get a booth," I told Mulder. "What do you want?" He turned to ask. "Um..." I looked up at the menu. "A small strawberry frozen yogurt, please." Mulder wrinkled up his nose. "Live a little, Scully." "I like frozen yogurt," I informed him with a huff. "Fine," he sighed. "What about Megan?" "She's too young for ice cream, Mulder," I rolled my eyes. "Even soft-serve?" "Mulder!" "Okay, sorry." He turned back to Jordan and they continued to look at the menu. I found a booth in a corner and pulled a high chair over to it. I'd just finished organizing Megan and giving her some toys when Mulder and Jordan appeared with the ice cream. Mulder had a cone that looked like French vanilla with cherry swirled through it and Jordan had a sundae with chocolate sauce and sprinkles. Mulder slid in beside me and Jordan sat opposite us. "Mmm," I said when I had my first spoonful. Mulder snorted. "What?" I shot him a look. "I bet the air in my mouth tastes better than that," he chuckled, looking at me sideways. "I doubt it," I contradicted. I was attempting to have another spoonful of yogurt when I felt Mulder's hand in my hair. "Find out for yourself." He was pulling me towards him, his mouth descending onto mine. Our tongues met and caressed each other as they had at the wedding. His tongue was gentle yet insistent as he delved into my mouth. Megan's rattle hitting the floor made me pull back. "Cherry cheesecake," I noted. "Not bad." "The yogurt wasn't as bad as I thought it would be," he admitted. The yogurt that had been on my spoon had dripped off onto the table. I wiped it up with a napkin. Mulder scooped up Megan's toy and set it on the table. "Why do you kiss like that?" Jordan asked suddenly. "Like what?" Mulder asked. "With your mouths open," he clarified. I felt my already flaming cheeks grow hotter. "Because we love each other," Mulder explained, making my heart flutter. "You don't kiss me like that. Don't you love me?" he frowned. Mulder chuckled. "There are two different kinds of love, Jordan." "There are?" he looked confused. "The way moms and dads love each other is different than the way they love their kids," Mulder tried to make him understand. "How?" Jordan still looked puzzled. I was being no help at all; still being speechless from hearing Mulder say that we loved each other. Mulder took a deep breath. "Okay, let me see if I can explain this. There is more than one kind of happy, isn't there?" "There is?" Jordan furrowed his brow. "Yes," Mulder continued. "When we were going to surprise Dana, did that make you happy?" "Yes," he grinned. "And now that you're having the ice cream, does that make you happy?" "Mmm hmm," Jordan nodded. "Do the two feelings feel exactly the same?" Mulder asked him. "No," Jordan admitted. "When we were going to surprise Dana it made me all tingly, but the ice cream is different. It makes me happy because I like the way it tastes." "Well, Jordan, Dana and I love you like ice cream," Mulder smiled. "And you love each other like a surprise?" Jordan beamed as he finally understood. "That's right. Now finish your ice cream before it turns into soup," Mulder teased him. Since it was Mulder's idea to get ice cream, I let him try to settle Jordan down at bedtime. I was finishing up the laundry when he came back downstairs. He flopped down onto the couch and flicked on the TV. "I thought you were going to bring your TV over." His turning on the TV reminded me. He laughed. "I did. I completely forgot about it. I guess I had other things on my mind," he winked at me. "It's in my trunk. I'll go and get it." I had separated the kids' clothes from Mulder's and mine and I carried ours upstairs. I was busily putting it away when Mulder appeared with his TV. We decided that my dresser would be the best place for it. While I finished putting the laundry away, Mulder fidgeted with the rabbit ears. "I'll have to get the Gunmen to install some cable up here," he announced. "I can't get much with this antenna." "Just as long as there's no triple X channel," I warned. "Yes, dear." Stripping to his boxers, he threw his clothes into the laundry hamper and climbed into bed. I'd been thinking all day about what I would wear to bed. My usual silk pajamas were out of the question and I didn't want to wear the same nightie that I'd worn last night. I had one other choice, a long black nightgown that I'd bought as a treat for myself, but had never had the opportunity to wear. Grabbing it out of my drawer, I hurried to the bathroom to change. Mulder looked up when I opened the door again. His eyes grew wide and he turned off the TV immediately. "Scully," he breathed. "You look--, that is--. C'mere." I smiled inwardly at my success. If Mulder enjoyed the sex and liked the way I looked, surely it wouldn't take very long for him to fall in love with me. He took me into his arms and was as gentle with me as he had been the night before. This time I cried out when I came because I wanted him to know that I was enjoying the sex too. As he cocooned me into his arms when we were done, he whispered into my ear, "I assume that it was better than nice, this time." I chuckled and assured him that it was far better than nice. He made a contented noise at the back of his throat and pulled me closer. The only thing that I could see that was missing from our sex was kissing. The only times that Mulder had open-mouth kissed me were during our wedding and at the ice cream parlor. Every other time he kissed me, his lips were closed. His open-mouthed kisses were reserved for when he needed to convince people that we were in love. I longed for the time that he would kiss me like that in private, because he wanted to, not because he felt compelled to. When I woke the next morning, I felt Mulder's erection pressing into my ass. Megan was co-operating because she was apparently still sound asleep. My nightgown had bunched up around my thighs and Mulder was slowly inching it higher. "Are you planning to divest me of my nightgown?" I chuckled. "Yeah," he said, his voice rough, "And I wasn't planning to waste any time this morning." "I noticed," I chuckled again as I pressed my ass back against him. "Mrs. Mulder!" he exclaimed. "Are you coming on to me?" "Have I upset your delicate sensibilities, Mr. Mulder?" I giggled. "Nah, I was just checking. It's been awhile," he explained. "I want you to know that I really like it that you enjoy it too, Scully," he said in his rich, low voice just as he began to slide his cock into me. "I do, Mulder, I really do," I breathed. This time as he was thrusting into me, he reached down and felt for my clit. I gasped when he touched it and my internal muscles clenched immediately. Mulder groaned and began to thrust harder, still stroking me. "Do you like the way that feels?" Mulder's voice was raspy in my ear. "God, yes," I moaned, unable to stop myself. Grunting, Mulder began to pump harder, his fingers still manipulating me. "I liked how tight you got when I started to rub your clit." His breathy confession sent me spinning over the edge. I could feel myself pulsing under his fingers, white lights were dancing behind my eyes, and my body was taut but still quivering at the same time. When I started to come down, I could feel him pulsing inside of me. I must have pulled him over the edge with me. "Wow, Scully," Mulder said, still a little short of breath. "That was quite the orgasm." "Mulder!" I protested. "What? I like that I can make you come like that. Is there something wrong with that?" "No, I guess not," I admitted. "Good, 'cause I *really* like that I can make you come like that," he informed me in his gravelly voice. I heard Megan begin to gurgle through the monitor. "I don't want to leave her until she cries," I told him. "That's okay," he said, giving me a squeeze. "Can you thank her for waiting until we were done?" The rest of the week passed quickly. I was beginning to understand why parents were always saying that their kids grew up too fast. It was because there was so much to do that time seemed to fly by. Mulder ran most of the errands; taking the paperwork back to Skinner and checking on the apartments. We took the kids to the park every day, and Friday we shopped for groceries again. On Saturday, my mother came over for supper. She was impressed with how well we seemed to have everything in hand. After the kids were in bed she asked if we'd had any problems. I told her about Jordan asking if we were his new parents and about his nightmares. She thought that we had handled everything perfectly. Before she left she told us to feel free to call her with any questions that we might have.v That night as I was getting ready for bed, I couldn't help thinking about all of the sex that Mulder and I had been having. He had quite the appetite, but I guess I already knew that. My body was beginning to anticipate his attention; warmth was already starting to build in my belly. I was going to have to do something about my limited selection of bedtime apparel. Tonight I was resorting to the top of a pair of pajamas. Mulder grinned at me as I came out of the bathroom. "We should go shopping," he chuckled. "I know, I was just thinking the same thing," I confessed. "As lovely as that is, Scully, I think it would look better crumpled up beside the bed." "God, that's a bad line, Mulder," I groaned as I began to unbutton the offending shirt. "Has anyone ever reacted positively to it?" "Just you," he grinned and then ducked out of the way as I pitched the shirt at him. The mirth drained out of his eyes and was replaced by what looked like hunger as he took in my naked form. It was then that I realized that he hadn't seen me nude since our marriage. The way he was looking at me made the warmth in my belly increase to a slow burn. "I was wondering, Scully," he spoke suddenly. "Would you mind if we tried something different tonight?" I was mildly surprised by his request but we *had* really only been using two positions. I was enjoying the sex so much that I hadn't noticed. "No, that's fine," I told him. "What did you have in mind?" "Um, would you get on top?" he asked pensively. My stomach flip-flopped. I knew from previous experience why men liked this position; Mulder wanted to watch me. The thought of him looking at me as I moved above him thrilled me. "Sure." I tried to sound nonchalant, but I think the timbre of my voice betrayed me. As I walked around to his side of the bed, he pulled off his boxers, tossed them on the floor, threw back the covers and scooted down so that he was lying flat on the bed. His cock was already thick and hard. I loved that I could do this to him. He watched me intently as I straddled him. When I was above him, I took hold of his erection so that I could ease myself onto him. He groaned in response. The sensation of his cock sliding into me made me inhale sharply. "You're so wet, Scully," Mulder noted breathily. "Did you like that I asked you to get on top? "Yes," I answered him honestly. "I'm glad," he breathed. I was already so excited that I knew it wasn't going to take me very long. I began to move slowly, savoring the feeling of his hardness sliding in and out of me. With each downward stroke I rotated my hips, rubbing my throbbing clit against him. I began to moan--I was so close. Mulder's hands skimmed up my sides to my breasts. He had never touched them before. Rolling my head back, I groaned as I continued to gyrate on top of him. "Do you like that?" he asked as he squeezed my breasts again. "Yes," I panted and picked up my pace. He was rolling my nipples between his fingers, sending jolts of heat straight to my center. Every inch of me was screaming for release. With every stroke I ground myself against him harder. "You are so beautiful," he panted. His words and the raspy sound of his voice sent a surge through me and the next time my clit rubbed against him, I exploded. As I quaked above him, I heard myself call his name, but I didn't care. As always seemed to happen with us, my orgasm triggered his and I heard him call my name, too. "What are you doing?" A voice close to me asked. I gasped in horror and quickly lay down on top of Mulder. "Go back to your room, Jordan," Mulder instructed. "Dana and I will be there in a minute." "Are you mad at me?" His voice quivered. "No, sweetie," I assured him. "Just give us a minute, okay?" "Okay," he answered quietly. "Oh my God, Mulder," I cried when he was gone. "What did he see?" "Enough, Scully, come on. We have to go and talk to him," he told me. "What will he think, Mulder?" I asked as I eased myself off of him. "I don't know, but don't worry, he'll be fine. Kids walk in on their parents all the time." "That doesn't make me feel any better," I groaned. I pulled on my robe and Mulder put his jeans back on. When we got to his room, Jordan was sitting on his bed looking scared. "Don't worry, Jordan, nothing is wrong," I tried to reassure him. "Did you have some questions?" Mulder asked. Jordan nodded. "You wanted to know what we were doing?" Jordan nodded again. "It's called making love. It's something else that people do when they love each other the way Dana and I do. It's a way of showing each other how we feel," Mulder explained. "Oh," Jordan said quietly. "But it's something that we do in private," Mulder continued. "So if our door is closed, you should knock first, okay?" "Okay," he agreed. "Do you have any other questions?" Mulder asked. "You're not mad at me?" he asked again. "No, we're not mad, Jordan. It was an accident. Just make sure you knock from now on and wait until we say you can come in," Mulder added. "Okay," he nodded. "What happened, sweetie?" I asked him. "Why did you wake up?" I thought maybe he'd had another nightmare. "I heard a noise," he informed me. "Well, I'll go make sure everything is okay. Do you think that you can go back to sleep?" Mulder asked him. "I think so," he said snuggling under his covers. "Sweet dreams," I said and kissed his cheek. "I'll go look around," Mulder said when we were back in the hall. "But it was probably just us that he heard. You were rocking the bed pretty well, Scully," he chuckled. "I was?" I asked in amazement. "You were," he nodded. "And I think you are the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on. I love the way you look when you come." "Mulder!" I protested, blushing furiously. "Get used to it, Scully," he grinned. I was getting used to it. I hoped that this was just another sign that Mulder was starting to fall in love with me. Could sex really be this good if he wasn't? I hoped not with all of my heart. The next afternoon I decided to take my mother up on her offer. Both of the kids were sleeping and Mulder was playing on his computer in the study. Even as I dialed the phone, I wasn't sure how I was going to ask my question. We chatted for a while before I brought it up. "You know how you said that if I had a question, I was free to ask?" I reminded her when I finally drummed up the courage. "Yes, dear, what did you want to ask?" "It's a doozy, Mom," I warned her. "That's fine, dear, I'm sitting down," she laughed. "Okay," I took a deep breath. "Here goes...Did any of us kids ever walk in on you and Dad?" "Oh, Dana, did Jordan walk in on you and Fox?" "Yes," I sighed. "What did you say?" she asked. "Well Mulder sent him back to his room and then we went and talked to him. We explained that we were making love and that was something that people did that to show each other how much they love each other," I told her. "It sounds like you handled it just fine," she assured me. "I hope so," I sighed. "Was he worried that Fox was hurting you?" she inquired. "No, why?" I wondered. "Well, since he was on top of you, most kids think that daddy is trying to hurt mommy," she explained rather shyly. "Um...I was on top," I couldn't believe that I was telling my mother this. "Oh," my mother laughed a little shakily. "Well, that may have been for the best, dear. At least you didn't scare him." "Yeah, but I'm still worried that we've scarred him for life. "You turned out all right," she chuckled. "What? I walked in on you and Dad? I have no memory of that," I laughed. "And when he grows up, Jordan probably won't either," my mother assured me. "Thanks, Mom. I feel better now. I was really worried," I told her. "You're welcome, Dana. Let's just hope you won't have any other problems for a while," she said. "I hope not too, Mom," I laughed. With my mother's reassurance I felt much more at ease. Jordan didn't mention anything about what happened all day, so I decided it was best to let it drop. If he had any more questions, I hoped that he would feel free to ask. The next morning after Megan went down for her nap, Mulder and Jordan were playing with some building blocks in the living room, so I decided to clean the bathrooms. I had just finished the master bath when Mulder came upstairs. "The social worker is here," he informed me. I peeled off my gloves and followed him downstairs. She introduced herself as Leslie Wilson as she shook my hand. "I'm going to talk with you and your husband, but I was going to start with Jordan, if that's all right with you?" "Of course," I smiled. "Is there some place we could talk?" she asked. "How about the study?" Mulder suggested. "That sounds fine," she smiled. After we showed her to the study we went to wait in the kitchen. I could barely sit still. Mulder tried to calm me down by holding my hand, but it wasn't working. After about 15 minutes Leslie appeared in the kitchen door, smiling broadly. "Jordan is playing with his blocks again. I just wanted to talk to you briefly," she informed us. "Sure, have a seat," Mulder smiled. "Thanks, but I'll just be a minute," she smiled. "I take it that Jordan accidentally walked in on you the other night?" My cheeks started to burn instantly. "Yeah," Mulder chuckled. "We didn't think to tell him to knock." "Almost every parent goes through it," she smiled. "Even if they have told the kids to knock. From talking to Jordan it sounds like you handled it beautifully." "Thanks," Mulder smiled. I was still speechless. "Okay, I'll be going now," she said. "Didn't you want to talk to us?" Mulder asked in surprise. "I did initially, but Jordan told me what I needed to know," she informed us. "So that's it?" I asked. "Yes, I'll give my report to the judge in a couple of days," she explained. "You've made a decision?" Mulder asked. "Yes, I visited the Barnes on Friday, you today, and I've reached my decision." "Can you tell us what it is?" I asked. "No, but I can tell you that when I went to visit the Barnes, they didn't make a very good impression on me. And from talking to Jordan today I know that their claim that your marriage was one of convenience is unsubstantiated," she said with a cryptic smile. After she left, Mulder and I stood in foyer and just stared at each other in amazement. "Did she just say what I thought she said?" I asked him. "I thought she said that we should get full custody," Mulder gave me his interpretation. "That's what I thought, too," I heaved a sigh of relief. He held his arms open to me and I accepted his hug readily. I laid my head on his shoulder as he caressed my back. "They are really ours now, Scully," he said softly. "I can't believe it," I said, shakily. "And for some reason, I'm suddenly very nervous." "Some part of you was probably holding back, Scully, in self- defense, just in case. But now that it's permanent--it must be sinking in," Mulder offered as explanation. "But I know that we'll be okay. Look how well we're doing already." Jordan was a little bemused by the fact that I kept giving him big hugs all day. I wanted to tell him that Mulder and I were really his parents now, but we had decided that we would wait until we had the official word. Who knew what might happen and I couldn't tell Jordan until we were 100 percent sure. I had forgotten that I'd said that I would get some new pajamas and that night I ended up stealing one of Mulder's undershirts. Not that he'd miss it; I'd never seen him wear one. In the last couple of days we had developed a little bedtime routine and I was enjoying it. Mulder would watch TV while I was getting ready, but as soon as I left the bathroom, the TV would go off. He would let his eyes wander appreciatively over me and then ask me to come to him. That night he grinned at me when I came out of the bathroom and reminded me about our plan to go shopping. "I know," I sighed. "You stay here with the kids tomorrow afternoon and I'll go and get some new stuff." "You mean that I don't get to come and watch?" He started to pout. "No, but I could give you a little fashion show tomorrow night, if you like," I offered, lowering my voice. I couldn't believe how brazen I was getting with him. I wondered if he noticed. "Take as long as you like then," he chuckled, his voice sending delicious chills through me. "But I don't want you to think that I don't like the way you look now," he added quickly. "The undershirt look is very good on you--very sexy. C'mere." My already racing heart leaped at his invitation. Now that he'd discovered that I liked it when he touched my breasts, he had squeezed and caressed them every time we'd had sex. They were aching in anticipation of his attention; my taut nipples were pushing against the fabric of the undershirt. As I approached the bed, he threw back the covers and patted the bed beside him. I got onto the bed and lay down. His hand immediately went to my breast and rubbed my nipple through my shirt. My back arched immediately, my body craving more of his touch. My breathing became shallow as I watched his head dip towards my breast. When his hot mouth covered my aching flesh, I gasped. Chuckling contentedly, Mulder continued to tease me through the undershirt. Finally I couldn't stand it any longer. "I want to take this off." I tugged at the offending garment. "Good," he smiled lustily at me. "Me too." After I'd tossed it aside, Mulder bent his head to my right breast again. His tongue swirled around my nipple and then he gently drew it into his mouth. My fingers clutched at his hair and my head was arched back as he continued his sweet torture. I was writhing beneath him; heat and moisture building between my legs when he turned to my left breast. As he continued to lavish the same attention on it, his hand covered my now lonely right breast and he caressed it, occasionally tugging on my nipple. His arousal was pushing into my thigh and I was almost in anguish with wanting him. When his mouth left my breast I thought that I was finally going to get what I wanted so badly. I was surprised to feel him press a kiss against my stomach and then another on my abdomen. "Mulder, what are you doing?" I managed to ask out my lusty haze. "You know what I'm doing," he answered, his voice sounding as heated as my own. "You don't have to," I told him. "I want to," he said, placing a kiss on my thigh. "Mulder, I don't want you to feel obliged to do that for me," I tried to explain. I knew it was a task that most men didn't relish. My words were met with silence, so I lifted my head to look at him. His face was a mixture of confusion and hurt. "Obliged?" he asked finally. "It's not necessary," I explained further. "It's enough for me when you're inside of me." "Obliged?" he repeated. I nodded, not sure why he wasn't understanding what I meant. "Scully, I thought that *you* were obliging *me*," he said softly. "What do you mean?" I shook my head in confusion. "You know that I love you. I thought that you were obliging me by having sex with me." I couldn't process what he was saying. "But I--, but," I stammered. "I thought that you loved me like ice cream." "What?" He sat up. "Like ice cream? How could you think that? Why did you think that I wanted to have sex with you?" "I thought that you enjoyed it and that maybe eventually you might fall in love with me." My voice was quivering as I spoke. "Oh, Scully," he sighed. "I thought the same thing. I was so thrilled that you were enjoying the sex. I hoped that it meant that you might be falling in love with me." "You mean that you love me like a surprise?" I asked in wonder. "Like the best surprise, like the biggest surprise you ever had on Christmas morning," he breathed. My heart was pounding wildly in my chest; tears streaming down my cheeks. "Oh God, Mulder," I sobbed. "I had no idea. That's the way I love you! I have for so long!" He practically flew up the bed towards me; his mouth was on top of mine in an instant, crushing it with a kiss. His tongue was in my mouth, swirling over my tongue, caressing the roof of my mouth. We parted, gasping for breath, only to have our mouths meet again, our tongues both fighting for deeper access. This was the way that I wanted him to kiss me; longed for him to kiss me. His lust had always excited me, but his raw passion thrilled me to my core. When we parted again, breathless, Mulder raised up on his elbow and gazed down at me, his eyes hooded. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to kiss you like that." "I might have an inkling," I chuckled. "Probably about as long as I've wanted you to." "Probably," he grinned. "Now, where was I?" I couldn't help grinning back at him. "A little lower," I chuckled. He kissed his way back down my belly and his touch was still gentle as he parted my legs. I was breathless in anticipation. Gently resting one hand on my thigh, I felt the other lightly caress my sex, making me shudder. When he began to place tender kisses on me, I groaned. The touch of his tongue against me brought my hips off of the bed. The flick of his tongue on my clit made me dizzy. Then he drew my throbbing bundle of nerves between his lips and sucked on it gently. I was moaning and panting, right on the verge of exploding. He released me and I felt momentarily despondent until I felt his tongue against me again. It felt like he was barely touching me, but my clit was so inflamed that the lightest touch felt like bliss. He slid his fingers into me and my muscles clamped down on them immediately. He continued to stroke me lightly with his tongue, every caress feeling like ecstasy. "Yes," I panted. I heard Mulder grunt at my pleasure, but he kept his touch feathery and steady. "Oh God, Mulder," I moaned, feeling like I couldn't stand it anymore. I had never felt this much euphoria before. It seemed like I might fly apart; wanting to shout for joy and cry in despair at the same time. "God, yes," I whimpered over and over, like a mantra. When Mulder rumbled his approval again the added stimulation was enough to send me careening into nirvana. Every muscle was taut as I quaked; the lights behind my eyes were the brightest I'd ever seen. My orgasm seemed endless, one shuddering wave right on top of another. When awareness began to percolate into my brain, I felt Mulder softly kissing my thighs. "And I thought you had fantastic orgasms before," he chuckled when he saw me open my eyes. "I was holding back," I informed him. "So I gathered," he grinned. "And so was I." His tone of voice made butterflies spring to life in my stomach. "I didn't want you to see how much I needed you," he confessed. "I thought it would scare you." "Oh, Mulder, I wish I'd understood how you loved me. We could have been making love all of this time," I sighed. "I think we were making love, just separately. Now we'll be able to share it and not hold anything back," he said softly. As he spoke, he positioned himself between my legs. The feeling of his cock pressed against me was heavenly, but when he began to ease his way inside of me it was beyond paradise. "Mulder," I groaned again. "You feel so amazing." "You feel like liquid fire, Scully," he whispered. All my nerve endings seemed hypersensitive, making his every movement feel like pure joy. "I thought it felt perfect before, Mulder," I informed him breathlessly, "But this is.." I couldn't find the words. "Consummate perfection," he breathed. My mind whirled at his choice of words. They made me realize that we hadn't truly consummated our marriage. Without this honesty between us, it never would have been real. "Absolute, utter, perfection!" He was panting now. His first strokes were slow and gentle, like he had always been with me. But, as he neared his peak I could feel him begin to lose control, his raw need taking over. "Yes, Mulder," I panted. "Don't hold back. I want you to show me." "Scully," he groaned and began to drive into me vigorously. I welcomed his passion, I needed it to feel whole. His desire for me alone was enough to bring me close to another climax. His face was pressed against my neck and I was clinging to him as he began to shudder and thrust into me with abandon. "Yes," I panted again. With one more shuddering thrust he came, his body quaking as mine had. Instead of calling my name like I was used to, he repeated, "Love you, love you," softly in my ear. As I held and caressed him while he quieted, I discovered that I felt different. Our sex had always been good; my orgasms gratifying. Now I felt completely satiated, as if my thirst had finally been quenched. Even though I had loved him the entire time, the knowledge that he was in love with me made the sex so very different. Saying that we were making love seemed so trite compared to how I felt. We were forging a bond, one that marriage vows alone couldn't begin to create. This is what consummating a marriage truly meant--creating a physical bond that could never be broken. The only thing that could have possibly made our life together any better happened on September 11, 2000. The Fairfax County Family Court awarded Mulder and me full custody of Jordan and Megan Prescott, although we had always known in our hearts that it was meant to be. We didn't need a document to tell us that we were a family. end

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