Author: Andrea

Title: Making Her Peace

Rating: Nc-17

Disclaimer: M,S & Skinner belong to CC and Fox

Spoilers: Up to and including Orison

Notes: Thanks to Aly and Dan for amazing speed.


*********************************************************************

"If you wanna pack some things, we can get outta here."

She consented wordlessly, moving to her dresser to gather some 
things. It was then that she saw the bible that Pfaster had hidden 
in her drawer. It took me a while to calm her fears. I knew she 
wasn't really afraid that I would implicate her in any way. She 
had covered for me more times than I care to mention. I knew she 
was afraid that some evil force had made her behave 
uncharacteristically.

I managed to get her to pack her things and got her out to my car
while we continued our debate. She was still unconvinced as I 
pulled away from the curb.

"Scully, you know that I am not entirely convinced that anyone's
hand was working through you..."

She opened her mouth to argue this point.

"Let me finish," I cut her off.

"Sorry."

"If anyone's hand was working through you, how could you believe
that it was anything but good? I don't know where to start here,
Scully. I guess my first point would have to be - why would 
something evil want you to kill someone as purely evil as 
Pfaster? Wouldn't that be counter-productive?"

"Wouldn't that make me worse than Pfaster?"

"So you think that if someone had killed Hitler, knowing that his
death would end the Holocaust, they would be just as evil as he 
was?

"This is hardly the same thing, Mulder."

"Why not? Pfaster would have killed you," my voice caught in my 
throat as I said the words.

She put her tiny hand on my thigh and began to caress me gently.

"He didn't kill me, Mulder. Except for a few cuts and bruises, 
I'm fine."

I still don't know what I did to deserve this woman. Here she is
comforting me, after what Pfaster put her through. I covered her 
hand with mine and squeezed it gently.

"I know, Scully, but he would have kept right on killing if you 
hadn't stopped him."

"You had everything under control, Mulder. It was over. I didn't
need to kill him."

"When did you see me, Scully? When did you actually realize that 
I was there?"

"When he hit the floor," she admitted.

"That is my point, Scully. In your mind you were doing what had 
to be done. You couldn't go through anymore of that and you 
couldn't let anyone else go through it either. I think you may be
right that you weren't in control of your actions, but I don't 
think it was an outside force. I think it came from deep inside of
you. A part of you that wasn't going to let this happen anymore 
took control and stopped the horror."

We drove in silence as Scully considered what I had said.

"Did you have more than one point?" she asked finally.

"You're still not convinced?"

"It's not that, Mulder. I just need you to help me work through 
the mixed feelings I'm having right now."

"Okay, Scully, whatever you need." I squeezed her hand again.
"The other point I was going to make is - how could you possibly
believe that anything evil could control *you*? You are goodness
incarnate."

She snorted.

"What?" 

"Come on, Mulder. I'm hardly a saint. I have the same dark 
feelings that everyone has; jealousy, envy, spite."

"Yeah, but it's how you deal with those feelings, that's 
different, Scully."

"Well I'm flattered that you think that way about me, Mulder, but
I think you're giving me too much credit." 

I pulled the car to a stop in front of my building.

"I still think that if anyone was going to be possessed by some 
evil force, it would be me. I'm the dark one, remember."

She was actually chuckling as we got out of the car.

"All I know is that while what I did may be understandable, it
is not forgivable," she said one the elevator doors had closed
behind us.

"I forgive you," I told her.

"I think you may be somewhat biased," she raised an eyebrow at 
me.

"You think my judgement is impaired by our relationship?"

"I do," was all she said.

The elevator doors opened and we walked down the hall towards my 
apartment.

"It's not my forgiveness you're after, anyway, is it?" I asked.

She shook her head. I opened my apartment door and she walked in 
ahead of me.

"I think that you should go and make your peace then, Scully."

She didn't answer me. I followed her to the bedroom where she 
deposited her overnight bag on a chair and then sat down on  the
bed.

"You know what I want to do, Mulder."

I shook my head.

"I want to get away from here for a while. Just you and me, 
no case, no interruptions, just you and me and some peace and 
quiet."

"I'll call Skinner and arrange it. I don't think we need to hang 
around here. I'm sure my report can wait. Did you have some place
in mind? Some place warm?" I offered.

"No, actually, I think I would prefer some place quiet where we
could just snuggle up in front of a nice fire." 

"I'll find something on the internet," I told her.

"You don't think I'm running away?" she asked.

"You know they would have wanted you to take some time anyway,"
I pointed out.

She sighed, "Yeah, I guess you're right. I think you're right 
about me making my peace, too. I'll go tomorrow morning."

"I'll go call Skinner."

"I'd like to take a shower, Mulder. Can I borrow one of your 
t-shirts to sleep in?"

"Did you forget to pack pajamas?"

"No."

I strode over to her and took her into my arms. She leaned into 
me heavily, wrapping her arms snuggly around my waist. I held 
her tightly, stroking her hair.


"Everything I have is yours, Scully, you know that." 


By the time Scully had finished her shower I had our getaway 
signed, sealed and delivered. What miracles man can work with 
access to the net and a gold card. When she walked into the 
living room in my t-shirt with her hair wet, I thought my heart 
was going to break. She looked so small. I thought back to the 
destruction in her apartment and her description of what had
happened. Who would suspect such fury out of that tiny form? It 
was an assumption I knew many had made and with one notable 
exception, it was a mistake never made twice.

"Did you talk to Skinner?" she asked me softly.

I nodded and patted my leg. The corners of her mouth curved up
slightly. She said nothing until she had settled herself onto my
lap. 

"This is new," was all she said.

"Well, we're new, Scully, besides, I wanted to show you the place I
found on the net. They have pictures." I navigated back to the
site to show her. 

"It looks beautiful, Mulder. Where is it?"

"Vermont. Our flight leaves tomorrow afternoon at 2. I think that 
should give us plenty of time. I can go to your place and pack 
whatever you'll need while you're at the church."

I felt her stiffen at my words. I regretted them instantly.I knew 
this was going to be possibly the most difficult thing she had 
ever done. I must have reacted in some noticeable way as well,
because Scully immediately put her arms around me.

"It's okay. I'm okay." She pressed her cheek against mine. "I'll 
admit that I'm not looking forward to this, but I know it's
something I need to do. I also need you, Mulder. I need you to be 
you. I need your strength and your vision. Please don't tiptoe
around me."

"I'm sorry, Scully. It's hard. I'm worried that I'll say or do 
the wrong thing."

"You've never held anything back before, Mulder. I don't want you 
to start now. I know we thought that we could keep work separate
from our personal lives, but I realize now that would be 
unrealistic. It's all intertwined for us." 

She had straightened up and was fiddling with my hair.

"Is that how you always know what I'm thinking?" I grinned at her.

"Must be," she smiled softly. 

She then leaned forward and pressed her lips against mine. I 
returned her kiss softly. I took her face in my hands and began 
to kiss her chin, her cheeks, her nose, and her forehead, 
eventually returning to her lips. When I pulled back so I could
see her, she was finally starting to regain that peaceful look
to which I have grown so accustomed. She leaned her forehead 
against mine.

"It's late, Scully. I think it's time to hit the hay."

It was almost midnight when we crawled into bed. In silent 
agreement we met in the middle of the bed. She kissed me again
softly. 

"Come on. Let's spoon up," I said quietly.

"Like little kittens?" she chuckled as she rolled onto her side.

"Little baby cats," I corrected her.

"Most people call them kittens, Mulder."

"I'm not like most people," I whispered into her ear.

"Mmm, and I thank God for that every day," she said sleepily.

I pulled her closer and my arm stayed protectively around her 
waist. She snuggled back against me.

"I love you, Scully," I told her gently.

She mumbled something back which I chose to interpret as, "Love
you, Mulder," but it just as easily could have been "want some 
butter".

It took a while after her breathing became slow and regular 
before I managed to drift off to sleep. As I lay there holding 
her, I thought about our relationship. Scully and I had been 
spending the night together more and more often, recently. I would 
have been happier with always, but neither of us had been 
prepared to take that final step. That night I changed my mind. I 
knew better than to bring it up, though. When we got back from 
Illinois I had asked her to spend the night. But she had said she 
was exhausted and was planning to go straight to bed, even though 
it was early. It wouldn't have mattered to me. I had just wanted 
her close. I let it drop, not wanting to appear too needy. It 
would not have been the right time to explain to her that staying
the night didn't necessarily mean sex. Just having her here would 
have been fine with me.

Sharing a bed with Scully had resulted in the most restful sleep
I'd had in years, but sometime during the night I awoke with a 
start. I wasn't sure what had wakened me, until I felt Scully 
struggling against imaginary bonds in her sleep. I didn't wake 
her, I just spoke to her softly, reassuring her, telling her 
that she was safe. She stopped struggling and snuggled back 
against me. My heart swelled when I heard her murmur my name. I
spent a long time watching her sleep, feeling the rise and fall 
of her chest. My eyes finally adjusted to the darkness enough to
see her face. Her dreams must have become more peaceful judging
by the sweet expression on her face. I had planned to stay awake 
for the rest of the night just to watch her, but the next thing 
I knew, I was waking up to the smell of coffee and pancakes.

Until Scully started spending the occasional night here (we
usually spent the night at her place), I would have been hard 
pressed to scrape anything together for breakfast. I usually 
settled for coffee and a doughnut on the way into work, but not
my Scully. She liked a big breakfast and when she didn't get one, 
she got downright cranky. I was always more than happy to oblige 
her by eating whatever she cooked.

My high spirits plummeted when I walked into the kitchen. Scully
was standing at the stove flipping pancakes. It looked like every
move she made was agony.

"Scully, I can do that," I tried to take the spatula from her.

"I'm fine, Mulder."

"Scully!" We had talked about that.

"Really, Mulder. I had a long hot shower when I got up. I'm a 
bit stiff, but it's nothing I can't handle. Sit down, it's 
ready."

After we ate, I insisted on doing the dishes while Scully called
her mother. Then Scully packed a bag for me while I showered and 
shaved and we were in the car by 10 o'clock.

"I could go in with you if you like, Scully," I offered when we 
were on our way.

"This isn't the doctor's office, Mulder. You can't come with me.
But it was sweet of you to offer," she smiled at me.

"After I pack your bag, should I wait in the car or come into the
church?"

"Whichever you're more comfortable with, Mulder."

We drove in silence the rest of the way. When I pulled up in front
of the church she leaned over and kissed me gently.

"I might be a while," she warned.

"Take as long as you need." I tried to encourage her with my 
brightest smile.

She chuckled and kissed me again. 

"Thank you," she said softly before she got out of the car.

I watched her walk into the church. I waited a couple of minutes 
and then headed to her apartment.

The team that Skinner had arranged to clean Scully's apartment 
was still there when I arrived. Before I managed to get inside I 
had to listen to Scully's landlord rail on about the damage to the
apartment. I assured him that it would all be repaired. I spent as
little time in her apartment as possible. I hadn't noticed the night
before, her landlord was right. There was a lot of damage. Seeing
it made me remember things I didn't want to think about.

When I got back to the church it was 10:45. Scully was no where 
in sight. I waited a few minutes and then went inside. The church
was dimly lit. The dark wood of the pews and the carpeting made it
seem even darker. There was no one in sight. As I approached the
confessionals I began to hear soft voices. As soon as I 
recognized Scully's voice I walked to the other side of the 
church and sat in one the pews to wait.

After another 10 minutes, Scully emerged from the confessional.
I stood up, but she headed towards the front of the church and 
knelt in one of the pews. I sat down and waited. I watched the 
back of her head. It stayed bent in prayer. I figured it shouldn't
be long now. I was wrong. She stayed another 45 minutes, not 
moving at all. I was about to go and see if she was alright when
she stood up. I waited for her at the back of the sanctuary. When
she reached me she slipped her hand into mine and we headed out 
of the church. I was quiet until we got into the car.

"What happened? Was he really hard on you? What kind of penance
did he give you?"

Scully started to laugh. It was good to hear her laugh. I missed 
that, but I was also confused.

"No, Mulder, Father McCue wasn't hard on me. He feels the same way
you do. He gave me a few Hail Mary's to say to make me feel 
better, the rest was all me."

"And?"

"I'm better, Mulder, not 100 percent yet, but definitely better."
she squeezed my hand. "It did help that the Father McCue agreed 
with you. He's a little less biased," she smiled at me.

Scully seemed to be a lot more relaxed as we headed to the 
airport. Our flight was on time and we landed in Burlington at 
3:30. The resort that I had chosen was about an hour away. I was 
already looking forward to getting cozy with Scully in front of 
the fire. Everything was supposed to be ready for us when we got 
there. The drive actually passed more quickly than I thought it 
would. Scully was more like herself and we talked easily most of 
the way. Once we were there we registered quickly and were shown 
to our suite. The bellboy showed us around; pointing out the 
fireplace and the jacuzzi. Scully put our bags in the bedroom 
while I tipped the bellboy.

"It's beautiful, Mulder. Just what I was thinking," Scully smiled
when she came back into the main room.

I was standing by the fire and she joined me, sliding her arm 
around my waist.

"I'm glad you like it," I bent to kiss the top of her head.

Scully chuckled and smiled up at me. It wasn't a friendly smile
and it wasn't a thank you smile. It was a smile that made my knees 
weak and gave me butterflies in my stomach. I opened my mouth to
say something, I don't remember what because before I could say 
anything Scully had my pulled my head down towards hers to kiss
me. She ran her tongue along my bottom lip and then slid it along 
my tongue. It wasn't until Scully moaned that I realized that I 
hadn't been idle while she was kissing me. I had pulled her close 
and one of my hands was on her ass while the other had found it's
way under her shirt. She moaned when I squeezed her breast. Her 
hands were under my shirt. She caressed my chest and then her 
hands made their way down my back to my ass. No matter how many
times she reminded me, I was always amazed that I seemed to 
arouse and excite her as much as she does me.

As my hands were working on the buttons of her blouse, hers were 
busy with the zipper on my jeans. When I felt her hand caress my
cock, it was my turn to moan. I started to move faster, quickly
removing the rest of her clothes. I had begun to kiss her neck,
working my way down to her shoulder, but I had to straighten up
so that she could remove my t-shirt. When I opened my eyes to look 
at her, she must have seen the shock on my face.

"Mulder, I know it looks bad, but I'm okay, really."

I had seen the bruises on her neck and wrists, but I hadn't seen 
her naked since it happened. I wasn't prepared for it. I could see 
bruises on her ribs, chest and upper arms and I knew her back was 
worse.

She put her hands on my face and made me look at her. She shook her
head.

"I know that by hurting me, he has hurt you too, but it's over and
now we have to start healing. I need you to help me heal, Mulder."

"God, Scully, I'm sorry, I wasn't..." I couldn't explain, I just 
leaned over and kissed her. "I love you so much, Scully, but I 
can't stand it when you are hurting."

"I'm not hurting right now, Mulder," she said softly.

I picked her up gently to take her to the bedroom.

"Here would have been fine with me," she grinned.

"The bed will be more comfortable," I pointed out.

"True," she chuckled.

I set her down on the bed and lay down beside her. I began to kiss
her again, savouring the familiar way her tongue played with mine.
I left her mouth and kissed my way down her neck to her breast. She
gasped when I sucked her nipple into my mouth swirling my tongue 
around it. I moved to the full underside of her breast and traced
it with my tongue. I moved back to her areola and traced it with my 
tongue as well. I returned to her nipple, gently grazing it with my
teeth. She was sighing softly and she seemed to be having trouble
keeping her hips still. I moved to her other breast and gave it the 
same attention. By the time I was ready to make my way to her navel,
she was moaning and lifting her hips off the bed.

"Mulder, c'mere."

The earthy sound of her voice sent even more blood south and made 
me obey immediately.

"Yes, Scully." 

"I want you inside me, now."

My plan had been to kiss my way all the way down one leg and up 
the other, possibly stopping along the way, but plans change. I 
couldn't deny her anything. As I positioned myself between her 
legs, I began to anticipate the expression of bliss that always
crossed her face when I first enter her and I was not 
disappointed. I stopped momentarily to enjoy the feeling of her
warmth surrounding me. I leaned in and kissed her. 

"God, I love how this feels, Scully," I groaned.

"Mmm," she groaned. "Me too."

As I began to move in an out of her, I was quickly overwhelmed 
not only by being inside of her, but by her response as well. I
loved the way she reacted to our love making. Her sighs, moans 
and gasps are an aphrodisiac to me. The way her internal muscles 
started to tighten as she approached her climax was enough to send 
me over the edge. We had made love often enough for me to know
that my final thrusts would bring her along with me and I heard 
her cry out and felt her vaginal muscles rippling over my cock. 

We kissed again before I moved off of her and we immediately 
spooned up. I usually lingered on top of her, but tonight I didn't
want her to bear any of my weight. I kissed her neck and stroked
her hair as our breathing returned to normal.

"Mmm, that feels good, Mulder," she sighed.

"I think so,too," I agreed. "I wasn't sure whether you'd feel
up to making love tonight."

"Knowing that you love me, and the way you show me that you love 
me is the best way you can help me heal, Mulder."

"Scully, if the strength of my love was enough to heal you, you'd
be better already."