Author: Andrea

Title: More than Vanilla

Rating: NC-17

Category: MSR, Scully POV

Disclaimer: I wish...then there would be no ninth season,

never mind a semi-Mulderless eighth.

Archiving: I'd be honoured, but I'd also like to know.

Notes: Thank you Dan and Sam for the great beta read!

Warning: If you only like your sex mainstream, stop here.

Summary: Scully finally makes her move.

Spoilers: None

Feedback: Yes Please! ardywyn@hotmail.com


You can find all of my stories at;

http://members.rogers.com/faloona4/atlast.html



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



I could hardly believe it. I'd finally summoned up the courage to 

make a pass at Mulder and he'd turned me down. That had been the

fear that had been holding me back all of these years. I'd 

finally managed to convince myself that I had to try. I'd been 

sure that knowing one way or the other would be better than never

knowing at all. Why in hell had I come up with that crazy idea? 

I'd never felt so small, so helpless, so utterly desolate before 

in my life.



I was still curled into the same little ball in the corner I'd

assumed as soon as he'd left. At first I'd stared blankly at 

nothing, thinking nothing and feeling nothing. Then the tears had

begun, slowly building up until sobs were wracking my body. When

I could cry no more some masochistic part of my brain began to 

run through the incident over and over.



We'd been working on a case report, trying to tie up all of the 

loose ends before we submitted it. After a couple of hours we

had both either been satisfied with it or fed up with it, I'm not 

sure which. Mulder had said he was hungry and we'd ordered in 

some Thai food. It hadn't taken long until we were both lounging

drowsily on my couch. It may have been because I was tired, or it 

may have been my contented belly, but some part of me had decided 

it was now or never. 



I wasn't even conscious of making the decision. It had just 

happened. I was on Mulder's lap and I was kissing him. It had 

been exactly like I'd always dreamt. His hands had gone to my 

hair, his tongue was exploring my mouth. Beneath me, I could feel

him start to grow erect. Then as quickly as it had begun, it 

had ended. Mulder had taken me by the shoulders and pushed me off 

of him. When I'd stared up at him in confusion, he'd shaken his 

head at me.



"You don't want this, Scully. I'm not who you think I am."



Before I'd had a chance to respond, he was gone. After I'd

retreated into the corner of the couch I hadn't moved an inch.

As I remembered his words, I became confused. If he'd said he

didn't love me, I would have been able to accept it eventually.

If he'd said a relationship would have interfered with our 

partnership, at least we would have had something to talk about.

But 'I'm not who you think I am". What the hell did that mean?



The longer I sat there, the angrier I got. How dare he dismiss

me like that? Where did he get off telling me what I wanted and

who I thought he was? Without looking at a clock or myself in the

mirror, I pulled on my shoes, grabbed my wallet and keys and flew

out the door. If Mulder wasn't who I thought he was, I wanted to

uncover this mysterious secret identity and decide for myself 

whether I wanted him or not. 



Mulder must not have had any regrets about what had occurred 

earlier, because I had to pound on his door to wake him up. 

Through his sleep-dazed eyes, he still managed to look 

surprised to see me. I'm not sure who else he would have 

expected.



"What the hell do you mean, 'You're not who I think you are'?" I

confronted him as soon as he'd shut the door.



"Have a seat," he waved me towards the couch.



I sat down heavily and watched him as he took a seat as well, 

leaving about a foot between us. After taking in my appearance, he 

looked down at his hands. It must have been obvious that I'd been

crying and part of me was happy that he was feeling guilty.



"Well?" I finally broke the silence.  



"Why are you doing this, Scully?" he asked without looking up.



"Why am I doing this?" I laughed ruefully. "For Christ's sake, 

Mulder, I laid myself bare tonight. I think I deserve a better

explanation than 'I'm not who you think I am'."



"Do you think an explanation will make either of us feel any

better?" his voice was cold.



"You seemed to be sleeping quite soundly," I pointed out

harshly.



"Drugs tend to have that effect on me."  



"Look, Mulder," I made no apology, "I can't force you to explain 

yourself, but if you have any feelings for me at all, give me

something -- anything."



"It's not easy to explain," he admitted after taking a deep 

breath.



"If you don't feel the same, Mulder, I can accept that," I 

prompted.



"It's not that," he shook his head.



"So you do love me?" I felt my heart get lighter.



"Love you? It's not as easy as that, Scully."



"Either you love me or you don't." It seemed fairly cut and

dried to me.



"If loving you was enough, Scully, I would have started something

a long time ago."



"What else is there?" I was very confused.



"Unfortunately, John Lennon was wrong. You need a lot more than

love," he chuckled sardonically.



"Like what?" 



"Compatibility," he shrugged.



"You don't think we're compatible?" I was amazed. "I may not 

always agree with everything you say, but I think if we thought

alike, our partnership would never have worked."



"You're right, Scully, our differences have made our partnership

work beautifully, but some differences can kill a relationship."



"Mulder, what are you talking about? I'm too tired to play 

guessing games."



"I'm talking about sexual compatibility," his voice was muted.



"Sexual compatibility? You aren't attracted to me sexually?" I

was shocked.



"It's not as simple as that, Scully."



"Good God, Mulder, do you like this whole enigma image? If I'm

not your type, tell me. I know you usually go for taller women,

but I've seen all shapes and sizes turn your head," I turned on

the couch to face him more fully.



"What I mean is, sexually my tastes aren't -- well -- vanilla."



"What are you saying, Mulder?" I was confused again. "You prefer 

African-American women?"



Mulder threw his head back and laughed; a full belly laugh. I

hadn't heard him laugh like that in ages. If it hadn't been at my

expense it would have made me happy. I sat waiting patiently, with

my cheeks burning, for him to explain.



"No," he began once he could speak again. "I mean, race doesn't

matter to me, and yes, exotic is good, but I'm not exclusive.

What I mean is my tastes aren't very mainstream."



I was finally at a loss. Not mainstream? What did that mean?

"Do you have a fetish" I couldn't help asking.



"I don't think it's a fetish really," he shrugged. "Maybe it is."



"Are you bisexual?" I wanted to know what we were talking about.



"Actually, I consider myself to be trisexual." He chuckled at

what must have been a shocked look on my face. "And I don't mean

three people at once, although I have tried that. I mean, I'll 

*try* almost anything," he clarified. 



"But not with me," I nodded slowly.



"Scully, you wouldn't want to do the things that interest me. 

Sure, at first, the sex would be great because it was new. But 

it wouldn't take long until I was bored and restless. I'd end up

feeling trapped."



"You think I'd bore you!" I spat. "Well, thank you very much, 

Mulder. You amaze me, do you know that? Your ego is fucking

huge, I'm surprised you can see around it."



"Look, Scully, you asked. Don't blame me if you don't like the

answer," his voice was tight.



"What makes you think I wouldn't like the same things you do?" I

challenged him.



"Scully," he began softly, "I've worked with you for years, I 

know you. You want someone who'll take care of you, someone who

will bring you flowers and send you love notes, someone who likes

to cuddle up by the fire. That isn't me, Scully."



"Don't talk to me like I'm a child, Mulder and don't begin to 

tell me what I like. You don't have a fucking clue," I was 

shaking with rage.



"Look, Scully," his tone was condescending, "I'm only interested

in sex with someone who would, for example, want to have anal sex

regularly."



"Oh!" I put my hand to my mouth in fake astonishment. "Is that

supposed to scare me or shock me? You don't know me as well as

you think you do, Mulder. Maybe you're too vanilla for me."



"I didn't want to get into a pissing match here, Scully, besides,

you'd lose," he chuckled.



"Wanna bet?" my voice was cold.



"Oh c'mon, Scully," he rolled his eyes.



"I'd only have one condition," I kept going.



"What's that?" I could tell he was merely humoring me.



"No hands." I watched as it sunk in and his eyes grew wide. He

smiled and nodded, giving me that round. "I thought you would 

have known by now not to make assumptions about anything, but

especially not about me," I continued.



"Scully, what if we try and it doesn't work? What if I start to

resent you, or vice versa?" he remembered to add, although I 

think it was mostly to placate me.



"What do you want me to do, Mulder? Make a list of everything I'd

be willing to do? Do you make all of your potential girlfriends

do that? Hi, my name is Mulder. Are water sports on your resume?"



"No, I don't ask for references, Scully, but I can usually tell," 

he shrugged.



"And that's why you've had a steady girlfriend the whole time 

I've known you?" I pointed out sarcastically.



"Okay, I so can't usually tell, but at least I know who has the

basics down, and I don't just mean the jargon," he raised his

eyebrows.



"I beg your pardon?" I couldn't believe what he was saying.



"Scully, you are very beautiful, you're smart, you have a nice 

body, but I doubt you could blow your way out of a wet paper 

bag."



"You obviously subscribe to the wrong opinion of Catholic school

girls," I stood up and walked to bathroom. It took me no time

to find what I was looking for.



"They obviously go about giving blowjobs differently in Catholic

school," he nodded toward the package in my hand.



"Shut up and take off your pants," I wasn't amused.



"Scully, I --"



"Do it!"



"Fine," he stood up, determination obvious on his face.



When I pulled his boxers down, he was already growing hard. After

getting to my knees, I ran my hand lightly over his shaft down to 

the thick thatch of hair at its base. "You could stand a trim," I 

looked up at him. His eyes widened almost imperceptibly, but he 

said nothing.



His determination couldn't stop his groan when I took him into

my mouth. I started slowly, only working on the head of his 

penis and gently caressing his balls. When I tasted the first 

drop of his lubricant, I took more of him in, letting my teeth 

graze him. 



Taking my hand off his balls for a second, I quickly unwrapped the

condom and rolled it over one of my fingers. Then, after letting 

him slide a little deeper into my mouth, I began to stroke his

perineum with my latex covered finger. His shudder made me 

proud of myself. 



I was letting my tongue swirl over him as I slowly bobbed my

head. His muscles had grown tense and I knew his orgasm wasn't 

far off. As I took him deeper, finally crossing the barrier into

my throat, I moved my fingers back to caress his anus. His 

strangled cry proved to me that I was winning this bet. 



With my free hand, I massaged his balls as best I could. His

cock grew huge in my mouth as he neared his peak. When I

thought he wasn't going to last much longer, I slipped my finger

inside of him to push him over the edge.



"Fuck," he practically bellowed as his cock began to throb.



I waited until he'd stopped pulsing to ease my finger out

of him and stand up. His eyes were still closed, his jaw was

slack and he was trembling. Instead of feeling righteous 

indignation, I began to get angry.



"Wow," he murmured when he finally opened his eyes. "I was 

wrong."



"You're God damned right you were," I pushed on his chest making 

him collapse limply onto the couch. "Who the fuck do you think 

you are? I certainly don't have to prove anything to you." I took 

the condom off and threw it at him. "You don't deserve me." I 

turned and stormed out of his apartment. As the door slammed 

behind me, I could hear him faintly calling my name.



Driving home I felt a sense of power that I'd never felt

before. It was energizing. I felt alive, invigorated, like I

could take on the world. When I got home, I ignored the blinking

light on my answering machine and went straight to the bathroom.

It was nearly Saturday morning. I could still catch four or five

hours sleep and make my lunch date with my mother. I decided to

shower first and then fall into bed. I'd deal with my hair when I 

got up.



I'd planned to be quick in the shower, but the hot water felt

incredible, so I lingered, simply letting the water run over

me. When I finally stepped out I was surprised to find Mulder

leaning against my vanity. I didn't rush to cover myself.



"I don't recall inviting you in," I began to dry my hair with a

towel.



"We have to talk," he eyes moved up and down my body.



"I think we've talked enough," I began to pat my arms dry.



"I was wrong, Scully."



"You were," I nodded, "about many things."



"And you're right, I probably don't deserve you," he

continued.



"Uh huh," I agreed as I started to dry my legs.



"But I *have* been in love with you forever."



"You have a strange way of showing it," I straightened up to

meet his eyes.



"In my eyes, Scully, you seemed like an angel, so honest and 

pure."



"I'm hardly pure, Mulder," I snorted.



"To me you were -- so fresh-faced and innocent. I didn't want to

sully you with my baseness."



"Your loss," I shrugged and walked past him.



"Scully," he reached out and grabbed my arm, "Can't I have 

another chance?"



"I gave you plenty of chances to stop making a complete ass of

yourself tonight, Mulder. Instead you chose to make fun of me

and call me a liar on top of that," I freed my arm and continued

toward my bedroom.



"I did not," Mulder defended himself as he trailed behind me.



"You accused me of pretending to know what I was talking about

by using the jargon," I reminded him as I pulled a pair of 

pajamas out of my bottom drawer.



"Are you trying to tell me that you've participated in water

sports, Scully?" Disbelief was evident in his voice.



"Depends on your definition, I guess," I shrugged.



"How many definitions are there?"



"I had a boyfriend who liked to watch me pee, especially

outside," I told him as I pulled on my pajamas.



"And that was okay with you?" Mulder's voice sounded somewhat 

choked.



"It turned him on, so that turned me on," I explained casually.



"And what? He just asked you one day if he could watch?"



"Yes, he did, and if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to get some

sleep now."



"Please, Scully, give me another chance."



"Why? Not one minute ago you thought I was lying again," I

accused him.



"I thought you meant you peed on someone, or someone peed on

you. I couldn't believe that."



"You're right, Mulder, I'm not into that, so if your tastes

lean toward golden, you can forget it," I crawled into bed.



"Not particularly, I mean, I don't want to pee on you, but if

you wanted me to, I would," he had one cheek on my dresser.



"Thanks," I chuckled.



"I guess what I want is someone who is willing to push the 

boundaries, try new things, explore with me," he tried to 

explain.



"Haven't I been doing that for years?" I was suddenly on the

verge of tears again. 



"Yes, Scully, you have," he admitted meekly. "I'm sorry I put

you on a pedestal. I had no idea..."



"I'm an explorer like you, Mulder. I have my limits, there

are some things I won't try, so maybe this won't work." I was 

sitting against my headboard, my knees pulled up to my chest.



"What won't you try, besides golden showers?" a smile quivered at 

the corners of his mouth.



"Well anything beyond that," I wrinkled my nose.



"Yeah, me either," he chuckled.



"And it sounds like you're into threesomes, I won't do that 

either."



"Well," he smirked, "I found out that one of the women always 

ends up feeling left out, and that's not a good thing."



"That would be my fear, that I'd be jealous," I admitted.



"I'd be jealous of another guy too," Mulder nodded. "Anything

else?"



"Well, I have some, what I think should be obvious, issues with

bondage," Mulder nodded as I spoke. "But it used to be part of

my sex play, so with time, I think it could be again." 



"With someone you trust," his voice had become raspy.



"And love," I added.



"And love," his eyes had become very dark. "Anything else?"



"Nothing I can think of. You?"



"Me?" Mulder sounded surprised.



"What won't you do?"



"I said I'd try anything, remember?" he grinned.



"I also seem to recall you saying that flowers, love notes 

and cuddling by the fire were out. If that's the case, I'm not

interested, Mulder. I like to play as much as anyone, but that

doesn't mean that romance has to be tossed out the window. I

would think if you appreciated what I was willing to do, you'd

want to show me." 



Mulder took a breath to say something, but I cut him off. "Let 

me finish -- I may be willing to do almost anything in the 

bedroom, or the kitchen, or the back forty, or wherever, but in

public I expect to be treated like I'm on that pedestal you used

to have me on. But I understand if you aren't willing to do 

that."



"Well, it's a bit out there, but I'll do it for you, Scully," he

winked at me.



"I don't want you to do anything you aren't comfortable with," I

wasn't smiling.



"I'm sorry about what I said, Scully, and I didn't mean it like

that. I meant I needed more than hearts and flowers, not that I 

didn't enjoy those things too. It's just that if that's all you 

do, it tends to get old very quickly," he clarified.



"I agree, Mulder, vanilla can get boring, but anything will get

boring if it's all you eat."



"So are you going to give me another chance?" he grinned.



"Somehow, Mulder, I get the feeling this will be the first of

many chances I give you," I arched an eyebrow at him.



Instead of saying anything, he started to pull his t-shirt

over his head. 



"One sec," I held up a finger as he began on his jeans.



Checking my bedside clock, I discovered it was 6:15 a.m.; 

there was no way I was going to be able to make my lunch date.

Knowing that my mother was an early riser, I decided to call her.

Mulder watched with a puzzled expression on his face as I dialed

the phone.



"Hi mom," I greeted her when she picked up the phone.



"Dana! What are you doing up so early?" she laughed.



"I haven't been to bed yet," I explained.



"I see. You've been out all night on a case with Fox again?"



"Something like that," I smiled.



"How about lunch after mass tomorrow then?" she suggested.



"Thank you, mom, that would be great."



"You get some rest, dear. I'll see you tomorrow."



Once I'd hung up the phone, Mulder began where he'd left off and 

in no time he joined me in the bed.



"I meant to apologize for that blowjob comment, Scully. You

certainly proved me wrong. That was incredible," he began to

unbutton my pajama top. 



"This may sound weird, Mulder," I began, "but I really like

being praised. I want to know when I'm getting it right."



"I'll be sure to let you know," he chuckled.



"Either way, okay? Or else I won't know what you like and what

you don't."



"Can I be honest with you about something then?" he asked a bit

hesitantly.



"Of course!"



"I really hate your pajamas."



It was my turn to throw my head back and laugh.



"I'll tell you one of my secrets, Mulder, when I end a 

relationship, I toss out all of my lingerie. There are too many

memories associated with it."



"That makes sense," he nodded.



"If you like, you can pick out my new selection. I'll be

wearing it for you, so it might as well be something you like."



"You've got yourself a deal, Miss Scully, but for now, naked 

will do," he waggled his eyebrows as he pulled down my pajama

bottoms. "There's one other thing I think we need to discuss

before we get started," his hand was between my legs, lightly

caressing me.



"What's that?" I spread my legs a little further and closed 

my eyes as I enjoyed his touch.



"I'll need to know when no means no and when it doesn't," from

his tone I could tell he was unsure about bringing this up.



"A safe word is a good idea," I smiled reassuringly. "It's no

fun when you have to stop the game to ask if I really meant no,

or if I was just role-playing."



"Good," he sighed. "Any ideas?"



"Umm," I thought for a moment. "How about proton?"



"Proton?" Mulder laughed.



"I'm not likely to shout that out by mistake," I shrugged.



"True," he grinned. "Proton it is!"  



"For both of us, right?" I wanted to be sure.



"For both of us," he nodded.



Then I watched in amazement as his whole expression changed. His 

eyes narrowed and grew dark again. His lips parted and his 

nostrils flared. I think I was holding my breath, waiting to see 

what he was going to do. When he began to speak, the harshness of

his voice sent shivers through me.



"Now you're going to pay for that little show you put on in

the bathroom. You like being a cock tease, don't you?"



I couldn't speak, I could only nod. My eyes must have been as

round as saucers.



"I thought so. Get onto your knees," he ordered.



I obeyed immediately, getting onto all fours. Almost instantly

he was parting my knees roughly. I was surprised when I felt him 

pushing on my head. "Head down!" 



As soon as my head hit the bed, he picked up my arms and 

held them behind my back, using only one of his hands. He hadn't

hurt me, but I was surprised by how forceful he was being. Not 

surprised enough to prevent me from growing very moist. 



"You like this, don't you?" he was rubbing his cock against

me, feeling how wet I'd become.  



I groaned at his question.



"Answer me!" he accented his order by smacking me on the ass.



"God, yes," I panted.



He began to ease into me, slowly at first, until he was able to 

glide freely; then he began to thrust into me with powerful 

strokes. When I moaned with pleasure, he sped up. His hips were 

slamming into my ass. I could feel my orgasm building already. I 

must have given him some indication, because he let go of my 

hands and slid his hand along my belly. When he found my clit, we

both groaned. It was then I realized that I must have been

tightening my internal muscles, increasing his pleasure. It 

didn't take long before the rough strokes of his fingers sent me 

flying. When I became aware again, Mulder was still pumping into

me with abandon; his fingers still pressed firmly against my 

clit.  



"Love the way you come," he grunted making my vaginal muscles

contract in response again.  "Fuck," he panted and began to 

thrust harder. When I felt him begin to pulse inside of me

and I heard the rapture in his voice when he called my name,

I couldn't help but succumb with him. My shuddering seemed 

endless.



The first thing I felt when the haze began to lift from my brain

was Mulder putting my arms down onto the bed. I hadn't realized 

that I'd left them on my back. Then he began to caress my back 

with incredible tenderness.  



"Mmm," I sighed and wiggled my ass against him.



"You know what, Scully?"



"What?" I still had my eyes closed.



"I was expecting you to stop me."



"You were?" I chuckled.



"I was," he eased out of me and rolled us to our sides.



"Well, I have to admit that I was a bit surprised, but I think

you know that I enjoyed it thoroughly," I chuckled.



"Yeah, I noticed that you had to have two orgasms. You couldn't

let me be ahead," he pulled me closer.



"All's fair," I murmured.



"Hey Scully?" he brought me back from the verge of sleep.



"Yeah?" I mumbled.



"You know how you mentioned Catholic school girls?"



"Mmm hmm?"



"You wouldn't still happen to have your uniform, would you?"



"I think my mom does," I chuckled. "Are you going to explain why

we want it?"



"I'll leave that up to you," he burrowed his nose into my hair.



"Thanks," I laughed wryly and began to drift off again.



"Scully?" 



"Yeah?" I opened my eyes, not sure if I'd been asleep or not.



"Did you ever get called to the principal's office?" He didn't

pause to let me answer. "I spent a lot of time there. I was a

very naughty boy."



end



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