Chapter 20
Washington, DC
4:30 p.m.
"Our baby," I tried to smile up at Mulder, but my mouth was wobbling. I didn't try to blink back my tears and I didn't care that Mulder bent down to kiss me in front of Dr. Cameron.
"There," I heard her say in a satisfied tone. "The baby finally stopped moving long enough for me to get a decent picture."
"A picture we get to keep?" Mulder straightened up.
"Yes, it's yours to keep," she smiled. "I can do another scan at 16 weeks to determine sex, if you like."
Mulder looked down at me and shrugged.
"No, I think a surprise would be nice. Don't you?" I squeezed his hand.
"The whole thing has been such a surprise; I think knowing the sex would ruin it," he agreed.
"Well, I'm done here, Dana," Dr. Cameron switched off the instrument. "Why don't you get dressed and go to the bathroom and then we can discuss a few things," she suggested as she wiped up the conductive jelly.
"Sounds good to me," I smiled wryly.
Dr. Cameron left the room taking the ultrasound cart with her. As soon as she was gone, I dressed and practically flew to the bathroom. By the time I got back Dr. Cameron had returned and was pointing out things on the picture to Mulder. He was listening with rapt attention.
"That's the heart and there are the kidneys -- oh, feel better now, Dana?" she smiled when she saw me.
"Much," I chuckled.
"I was just telling Fox that the measurements I took during the scan confirm that you are about 9 weeks along. So that puts your due date at May 19," she wrote it down in my chart at the same time.
"That's about what I calculated," I nodded.
"Do you have any questions or concerns?" she looked at us in turn.
"I can't think of anything." I felt like I should ask her something, but I was still too overwhelmed from the emotional roller coaster ride I'd be on to think clearly.
"Have you been having any trouble?" she prodded.
"Some morning sickness, but I've learned to manage it," I explained.
"What about you, Fox?" she turned to Mulder.
"Any questions I've had, Dana has answered," he shrugged.
"Okay," she smiled. I'll just prescribe you some prenatal vitamins," she began to write on her script pad. "And I'd like to see you again at 12 weeks. I'll start weighing you then and I want to do a hemoglobin and a blood sugar. Be sure to make your appointment early in the day so we can get a fasting sample."
"All right," I smiled.
"And by all means call me or come in if you have any questions or concerns," she stood up and passed me the prescription.
"Thank you, Dr. Cameron," I smiled as I shook her hand.
After Mulder shook her hand and thanked her we walked out to the reception area to make another appointment, but the receptionist had already left for the day. I made a note in my day planner to call the next day.
"Why so quiet?" I asked Mulder as we walked to the elevator.
"I think today is the first time that it was real for me, Scully," his voice was muted. "I knew before today, but it seemed more theoretical than actual. Do you know what I mean?" he pushed the elevator button.
"I think I do," I smiled. "Seeing the baby makes it far more easy to come to terms with than hearing that a pregnancy test is positive."
"I still find it hard to believe that little guy is jumping around inside of you like that," he put his hand on my belly.
"Since half of the baby's DNA comes from you, Mulder, I don't find it hard to believe at all," I grinned at him as the elevator doors opened.
"If he gets the right DNA from your side of the family, this kid might have a chance at the NBA -- or WNBA," he remembered to add. "Did you finally find a redeeming quality in Bill?" I laughed.
"He must have at least one," Mulder rolled his eyes.
"I wonder if he feels the same way about you?" I winked mischievously at him.
I wasn't surprised to find supper almost ready by the time we got home, but my mother didn't want to talk about that.
"How did everything go?" she asked breathlessly when we walked in the door.
"Everything is fine," I smiled, glancing at Jordan. So far, my mother was the only person who knew about my pregnancy aside from Mulder and my doctors. I wasn't planning on telling anyone else until I'd passed the 12 week milestone. "How was your day, Jordan?" I picked him up to give him a hug.
"Good," he snuggled into my shoulder. "I had fun at school and Grandma let me help her make supper."
"You helped with supper?" Mulder made a face. "If it's one of your mud pies, I'm not interested."
"It isn't," Jordan giggled and squirmed to be let down. "We made spaghetti."
"And do you promise that you didn't use any worms?" Mulder looked at him askance.
"There's no worms," Jordan laughed. "C'mere, I'll show you," he tugged on Mulder's hand.
"What other tests did the doctor want to do?" my mother asked as soon as Mulder and Jordan disappeared into the kitchen.
"Ma ma ma," Megan leaned out of my mother's arms toward me with her hands out.
"Hi sweetie," I smiled as I took her. "She didn't believe that I could be pregnant, even after the internal exam indicated I was," I explained.
"Why not?" she looked puzzled.
"Because she's the same doctor who diagnosed me as sterile," I smiled at Megan as she played with my necklace.
"Oh," my mother's eyes widened.
"She wanted to do an ultrasound next week because she still wasn't convinced, but Mulder insisted that she do it today," I started to head to the kitchen.
"I don't blame him," she shook her head as she began to follow me. "Scaring you like that and then wanting you to wait a week," she huffed.
"Should I tell Andrew supper's ready?" I hesitated at the kitchen door.
"Oh, he called to say not to hold supper for him. He was expecting to be late," she explained.
I suddenly had a vision of Andrew hunched in front of his monitor, sweating over his case report. I hoped Mulder and I hadn't pushed him too hard. Heading back to the living room, I tried to reach him at the office to get him to call it a day, but I got no answer.
"You had another call too," my mother had followed me into the living room, but she looked like she really didn't want to tell me.
"Who was it?" I wasn't sure if I wanted to know.
"Your lawyer," she grimaced.
"Oh my God, we forgot our appointment," my heart was in my throat. We were supposed to see him the day Leigh broke into the house.
"I told him that there had been some trouble here that day and he completely understood. He assumed you been called away on a case or something similar," she consoled me.
"Did he reschedule?" I asked anxiously.
"Actually, he asked if he could drop by this evening," my mother smiled.
"Really?" I was surprised. "Did he say when?"
"I tried to get him to come for dinner, but he already had plans," she shrugged apologetically. "So he asked if he could drop by around 8 o'clock."
"Thank God," I sighed. "I can't believe I completely forgot." Next I had to tell Mulder. I wasn't looking forward to it after I'd given him such a hard time about forgetting my doctor's appointment.
My mother stayed for supper since her drive would be easier if she waited a couple of hours. I did have to remind her about the traffic and the fact that she'd made the food to get her to stay. It ended up being a very boisterous meal. Megan was feeding herself spaghetti. Mulder was still teasing Jordan about the noodles, insisting that they were worms. To top it off the dog whined at the back door to be let inside for the entire time.
When we were done I asked Mulder to give the kids a bath right away since they were both almost completely covered with sauce. After I brought Guinness inside and fed him, my mother and I cleaned the kitchen while she talked about her day with Megan and Jordan. We were sitting at the kitchen table looking at the ultrasound picture when I heard Mulder come downstairs with the kids.
After slipping the picture back into my briefcase, we went to the living room to join them. Both kids were in their pajamas; Jordan in his Yankee pinstripes and Megan in a pink terry sleeper. She was sitting in the middle of the room playing with her ring stacking toy while Mulder and Jordan watched TV. Since Guinness was fairly well trained I let him in the living room with us. He immediately trotted over to Mulder and lay down at his feet.
"Keep an eye on him, Mulder," I warned as I sat down. "If he gets restless, take him outside."
"I will," he smiled and then turned back to the baseball game he was watching. The Yankees had made it to the post-season again, so I was preparing to be a baseball widow for the next couple of weeks. My only consolation was that the World Series would be over by the time we took possession of the house. I'd have to remember to thank God for small miracles.
I was telling my mother that we'd hired the movers not only to move us, but to pack everything as well when I noticed that Megan had begun to crawl toward me, bringing her toy with her. It was a complicated process. First she would start to crawl toward me, then sit down and pull her toy up to where she was sitting, and then begin the cycle again. A couple of times she crawled too far and had to backtrack for the toy. When she was a few feet away from me, she pulled off two of the rings and then pushed herself into a standing position. Glancing quickly at my mother, I discovered that she was watching Megan closely too. A couple of times Megan teetered and I thought she was going to sit back down, but she managed to regain her balance.
"What have you got there, Meggie?" I found myself using Mulder's endearment more and more often.
She graced me with a full-faced smile and to my amazement lifted her foot and took a step toward me.
"Mulder!" I whispered.
"Hmm?" he didn't look away from the game.
"Look!" I said more emphatically as Megan took her second step.
He turned his head in time to see her third step.
"Do you have something for Mommy?" I held my hands out to her.
"Ma ma ma," she grinned and held out the rings she was carrying.
"Okay, bring them here," I smiled.
"Look at her go!" I could tell that Mulder was excited from the sound of his voice.
Megan took two more tottering steps and then decided she was close enough to simply fall into my arms. When I scooped her up everyone began to cheer and clap their hands. The noise startled Megan and she turned to look at Mulder. Her concern melted away when she saw the huge smile on his face.
"That's my girl," he laughed as he stood up.
"She didn't practice or anything," Jordan sounded surprised. "She just walked."
"Everything she does is practice for walking and talking, for growing up, just like you," my mother explained.
"C'mon, Jordan," Mulder beckoned him with a nod of his head. "Let's see if Megan will walk for us." He sat down in the middle of the room.
"Okay," Jordan grinned and ran to sit on Mulder's lap.
Mulder spread his legs and began to call to Megan. "C'mere Meggie," he held his arms open to her. "Come and see Daddy."
I watched as a big smile spread across her face. Then she turned, dropped to her knees and started to crawl toward him.
"Oop," I scooped her up quickly and stood her on her feet. "Walk for Daddy."
"Yeah, Megan, walk," Jordan clapped his hands and bounced on Mulder's leg.
Still grinning, Megan dropped to her knees again and began to crawl.
"Just a sec," I got up and scooped her up again. This time I let her hang on to my index fingers. Laughing, she began to take small steps toward Mulder and Jordan. After she'd gone a little way, I slowly took one finger away. While Mulder kept her attention by clapping and talking to her, I eased my other finger out of her grasp.
After taking about ten more cautious steps, Megan fell into Mulder's hands. He was busy congratulating her with noisy kisses when someone knocked at the door.
"That'll be Brent," he managed to stand up with a child under each arm.
"I can get the door," I tried to call him back.
"It's okay," he smiled over his shoulder as he rounded the corner into the hallway.
Brent had hardly settled down in the living room when the front door opened again.
"I've got great news," Andrew called. "I found an apartment," he informed us as he walked into the room. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you had company."
"Don't worry about it," Mulder waved him off. "Andrew Guernsey, this is Brent Garrow, my lawyer."
"Pleased to meet you," Andrew shook his hand. "Oh, is this about the house?" he looked down at the papers.
"Nice to meet you too," Brent smiled. "Yes, there are just a few things to sign and then I'll be out of your way."
"There's no rush," I assured him. "I feel awful about missing our appointment. Especially after we bothered you on the weekend," I felt like I couldn't apologize enough.
"I understand completely," he smiled graciously. He had just begun to explain the paperwork when Megan began to rub her face against Mulder's shirt.
"I'll take her," my mother spoke up immediately. "You come too, Jordan. As soon as I have Megan settled, I'll read to you, okay?"
"But I'm not tired," he protested as a huge yawn overtook him.
"I'll come and give you a kiss as soon as we're done here, Jordan, I promise. You go with your Grandma," I nodded toward her.
"But I wanted to watch the game," he pouted, making everyone laugh.
"I'll let you stay up later when it's not a school night, Jordan," Mulder promised as he set Jordan down on the floor.
"I wanna see the game tonight!" he stamped his foot.
My mother and I looked at each other in surprise. Jordan hardly ever disobeyed, and certainly not Mulder. He worshipped the ground Mulder walked on. I couldn't help wondering why he chose a night that we had company to make a fuss.
"On the other hand, Jordan," Mulder's voice became serious, "I could *not* let you stay up to watch a game, even on the weekend. And if you like, you can start going to bed before Megan. Does that sound like fun?"
"No," Jordan was still pouting.
"Then I suggest you hustle your butt upstairs," Mulder's eyes had never left Jordan. "Your mother and I will be up to kiss you goodnight in a couple of minutes."
Jordan turned and, without saying goodnight, began to walk toward the stairs. He wasn't quite stomping, but his footfalls were definitely on the heavy side.
"What was that all about?" I looked at Mulder when Jordan was out of earshot.
"I probably talked up the game a little too much," Mulder admitted guiltily. "I'll talk to him when we go upstairs."
"I'll be out of your hair in a minute," Brent promised.
"Don't rush off," Mulder spoke quickly. "I thought you might want to watch the game."
"Sounds good," Brent handed Mulder his pen.
So as soon as we'd signed the paperwork, Brent secured it in his briefcase while Mulder and I went upstairs. Jordan was supposed to be waiting in his room for my mother to read him a story, but when we got there he was already asleep.
"We can talk to him tomorrow," I whispered.
We met my mother in the hall and went back downstairs. While Mulder was retrieving some beer from the kitchen, my mother said her goodnights.
"See you tomorrow, Fox," she smiled when Mulder reappeared.
"I'll leave you guys to watch the game," I informed them when my mother was gone.
"You don't want to join us?" Mulder patted the couch beside him.
"I think I'll pass," I rolled my eyes. "I have some reading to do anyway."
Leaving the men to drink their beer, I went into the study to catch up on some journal articles I'd been meaning to read for some time. When I was done, I said goodnight to the guys and went upstairs to take a bath. I'd just climbed into bed when I thought I heard Mulder come up the stairs. It was 10:45, so I assumed the game was long since over and they'd been discussing whatever men discuss after a ball game. I was surprised when I heard him go down the stairs again. I was about to turn out the light when I heard him on the stairs again. This time the doorknob began to turn slowly.
"Oh, you're still up," he looked at me in surprise when he opened the door.
"I thought I heard you come upstairs a few minutes ago," I furrowed my brow.
"Yeah, Brent had too many beers to risk driving," Mulder explained as he stripped off his clothes. "We all figured it would be safer for him to spend the night on the couch. I was getting him a pillow and a blanket."
"Did you enjoy the game?"
"Well, the Yanks won, so Brent and I did. Andrew, not so much," Mulder chuckled.
"Were they playing the Red Sox?" I was confused. I'd seen the two teams and I know baseball well enough to at least recognize the uniforms.
"No, but Andrew wants the Yanks to lose just on principal -- it doesn't matter who they're playing," Mulder was grinning.
When he was finished undressing, he made a quick trip to the bathroom before crawling into bed with me. His goodnight kiss tasted of beer and toothpaste. It wasn't a combination I'd normally enjoy, but any kiss from Mulder was pleasurable for me. I was disappointed when he lay back down and closed his eyes. Flicking off the light, I turned to face him.
"Tired?" I whispered.
"Mmm hmm, long day," he nodded.
Long day? It wasn't even 11 o'clock yet. The Mulder I knew and loved was a night owl. I wondered if the beer had made him drowsy or if there was another reason he was in a hurry to get to sleep.
"Goodnight, then," I snuggled under the covers.
"Night," he murmured.
"Mulder?"
"Yeah?"
"I know you're tired, so you won't mind if I masturbate, right?"
"Wha--?"
"I just want to make sure I won't disturb you if I masturbate. I wouldn't want to keep you up if you're tired," I kept my voice to a whisper.
"No, uh, sure, go ahead," he sputtered.
"Mmm, thanks," I smiled and rolled to my back. If I knew Mulder, I wouldn't be on my own for long. Spreading my legs, I pulled my nightie up slightly and slipped my hand between my legs. I really had no intention of going through with it, but knowing that Mulder would be attuned to every sound and move I made actually began to excite me. I couldn't stop myself from sighing when my fingertips grazed my clit. Beside me, I could hear Mulder's breathing quicken, and I felt the bed move as he shifted his position.
"I'm sorry, Mulder. I can tell this is keeping you up. I'll just go into the bathroom so you can sleep," I began to slide out of the bed.
"Stay," he grabbed my arm and pulled me back beside him. My hip was now pressing up against his erection.
"What's this?" I slipped my hand between us to caress him. "I thought you were tired."
"Keep going," he rolled over to turn his light back on and rolled back again quickly.
"What?" I hadn't been expecting this reaction.
"You're not bothering me. Keep going," his voice was rough and his normally hazel eyes had grown dark.
"Okay," I let my hand drift down again.
Mulder watched my hand as it moved beneath the covers. As I was pulling my nightie out of the way again, he startled me by whipping the blankets away.
"I want to see," he explained when I looked at him in surprise.
The hungry look on his face had rendered me speechless, so I could only nod. When I ran my fingertips over my clit, I drew a sharp breath. Mulder's reaction had brought me very close. Nothing was more arousing to me than his complete loss of control. Knowing that I could bring him to the brink like this was almost enough to make me come.
Dipping two fingers inside of myself, I used the abundant moisture I found there to lubricate my clit. My orgasm was close and I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore.
"What are you thinking about?" Mulder's voice was gravely.
"You," I breathed.
"Tell me," the lust in his voice made me shudder.
"I like it when you react like this," my voice trembled as my fingers continued to circle my clit. I knew it would only take the tiniest bit of direct pressure to make me come.
"You like that you can do this to me?" his breathing was ragged. "You like that a few words from you can turn me on instantly?" he rubbed his erection against me.
"Yes," I panted.
"You like that just the idea of you masturbating beside me is enough to make me insane with lust?" his voice quivered as he spoke.
"God, yes," I groaned.
"And you like knowing that I'm going to fuck you as soon as you come?"
His words were more than I could take. My clit began to throb even before I began to stroke it in earnest. As every muscle in my body seemed to grow taut, my hips came off the bed and I started to quake.
"I love the way you come," his breath was hot against my ear.
"Mulder," I moaned as another wave surged through me.
I was still trembling and trying to catch my breath when I felt him position himself between my legs. When I opened my eyes, I found that his eyes had grown even darker. The predatory look on his face made my stomach flip-flop.
"Is this what you wanted?" his voice rumbled as he began to slide into me.
After my orgasm, every nerve in my vagina seemed supersensitive. His cock felt exquisite inside of me.
"Yes," I confessed breathily.
"Jesus, Scully," he choked before his lips descended onto mine.
As he ravaged my mouth, he began to thrust into me. This was not going to be sweet and slow. It was going to be exactly what I wanted -- uncontrolled passion.
Mulder moved his lips to my neck as he began to pump faster. I met every stroke, our bodies colliding heavily. Every thud sent a delicious vibration through me. Just as I felt him begin to quiver, I clamped my muscles down on him.
"Fuck," he grunted. "I'm gonna --"
"I know, Mulder," I caressed his neck. "Come for me."
"Yes!" his voice was raspy. "Scully, I --" his thrusts became almost frantic.
"God, Mulder," I hadn't thought I would come again, but I felt another surge building inside of me.
"Want you to come again," his words came out staccato.
"I --" I tried to assure him that I was right on the verge when I began to shudder violently.
"God, yes," his shout was muffled by my pillow as I felt him pulse inside of me.
We stayed that way for several minutes just kissing. Part of me enjoyed this after play almost as much as having him inside of me -- almost.
"Why?" he wondered when he finally rolled to his back. "Why didn't you just say you wanted me to make love to you?" he pulled me on top of him. "You know I would have."
"Yes, but would you have fucked me like that?" I snuggled against his chest.
He began to stroke my hair, not answering my question right away. "You wanted it to be like that?" he sounded surprised.
"I did," I sighed contentedly.
"Why?" I could hear the confusion in his voice. "It doesn't mean that I love you less if we make love gently."
"I know, but I need that lust, that loss of control. Especially now," I tried to explain.
"I still don't understand," I felt him shake his head.
"Ever since we found out I was pregnant you've been hesitant, treating me like a china doll. And while that is nice occasionally, the man that I love loses himself in his desire for me. Do you have any idea of what a heady experience that is for me? To know that you love me and want me so much that it overwhelms you?"
"You like that?"
"Like it? I live for it. I love seeing that look in your eyes -- the one where it looks like you want to devour me. It stirs up something in me, Mulder, some primitive emotion and all I can think about is fucking you."
"That's all it takes?" his voice was quiet.
"Yes, Mulder, one smoldering look from you and I'm yours," I pressed a kiss to his chest.
"Scully?"
"Yeah?"
"Do I give you these smoldering looks before or after you give me your come hither look?"
end chapter 20